


Thessia Burns:  Lost and Found

by BA_Tanglepaw



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: Action, F/F, Femslash, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-15
Updated: 2013-02-21
Packaged: 2017-11-29 08:11:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 32,018
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/684750
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BA_Tanglepaw/pseuds/BA_Tanglepaw
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Shepard and Liara fight to save Thessia and their newly formed bond.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prelude to Fire

**Author's Note:**

> A/N - Since the plot is really all about the mission on Thessia, it is pretty straight forward. I have used game dialogue as the basis, but have redacted, added, conjectured and embellished to flesh out my characters, and frankly...to make myself happy. Of course, the story is focused on FemShep and Liara, but their shipmates are lurking about as well. It's really my novelization of what happened and the personal consequences for Liara/Shep's relationship.
> 
> This story is dedicated to two of my favorite authors:
> 
> WordKrush for your timely advice, ideas, encouragement, generosity and your wonderful stories. You are a gem!  
> and to -
> 
> Rae D. Magdon for your inspiration, generous spirit and encouragement, as well as your lush tales and the growing mythology of Tevos and Aria. 
> 
> Cheers to both of you !

**War Room – Normandy SR-2 - Post-Rannoch**

 

Shepard scrubbed a weary hand through her short, dark hair and palmed the back of her neck as she leaned into the war console railing. She could feel a headache just begging to emerge from the tension in her shoulders and the muscles at the base of her skull. The Reaper war was beginning to take its toll on her. As if fighting wave after wave of the sinister machines and their minions weren't enough, she also had to contend with the Illusive Man's hidden agenda as well. Then to top it off, there were the constant demands of the politicos, and the tension and infighting among the very people she was trying to save. 

She grimaced at the thought. _Yeah, cross being a diplomat...or a mother duck off my bucket list._

As she prepared to log out, she reached to rub a sore spot on her collarbone and felt her hand brush the chain holding her dogtags and a small, silver, non-regulation medallion. The little medal had been given to her as a special gift. A reminder that hope is always alive. That even in the darkest times, lost things could be found. Things like discovering the missing piece of the Crucible. Things like the Catalyst.

She realized her headache and tension were the result of thinking way too much coupled with major over exertion. Liara was probably feeling it too. _That's why they pay me the big bucks but some sleep might be good._

As weary as she was, she was wary of going _to_ bed, at least when sleeping was the objective. Sleeping involved dreams, usually bad ones. During these days it did anyway. But for now, she had to admit that since Liara had finally consented to move into her cabin, being _in_ bed was a pleasant thought. 

As she turned to attend to those more pleasant things she was interrupted by the voice of Sam Traynor. _“Commander, you are being hailed by the Asari Councilor.”_

Straightening her uniform, she prepared to take the comm. “Put her through, Traynor.”

The conversation with the Councilor was blessedly brief. The upshot was that Tevos wanted a meeting with her on the Citadel. But, Shepard sensed that there was much more to it. Beneath her congenial, congratulatory words there was an unspoken tension. Curiosity piqued, the Spectre was suddenly very anxious to get to there.

Shepard keyed the comlink to the Normandy's cockpit. “Joker, lay in a course for the Citadel and give me an ETA”

The helmsman quickly accomplished the task. _“Aye, aye Commander.”_

“ _ETA is nine hours, forty-two minutes and fifty-three seconds,”_ EDI chimed in.

Shepard yawned. The last mission had taken its toll on her body. It's not every day she had the opportunity to paint a target on a Reaper destroyer using a hand-held ladar gun, with only her feet, her reflexes and her cunning to keep her from being vaporized. “I'll be heading back to the loft shortly. EDI, give me a wake-up call in eight hours.”

“ _Very well Shepard,”_ EDI pleasantly confirmed.

“ _Say hello to Liara for us...She's still in her office.”_ Joker's knowing chuckle echoed on the comm as he turned to tease the AI. _“Now EDI, we both know you're just taking a wild guess at that...you sure you're not rounding off. Where are the milliseconds?”_

“ _Would I lie to you, Jeff? It is, after all, an ETA. That is estimated time of arrival...,"_ were the last words Shepard heard as she cut the link and turned from the war terminal, leaving her helmsman and the ship's AI to their playful banter.

 

xxx

 

**Normandy - Liara's Office**

As Joker predicted, Shepard's trek through the Normandy took her on a side trip to the door of the Shadow Broker's new lair. Casually leaning on the door frame, she took a moment to let her eyes rest on the stunning scientist that had become the center of her universe. Liara peered at the monitor intently, a slight wrinkle creasing her forehead, muttering to herself as she worked, completely immersed in the data flitting across the screen.

Shepard drank in the sight, proud of the asari's dedication, as always impressed, but worried. _She works too hard._

It amazed Jane to believe that she'd managed to bond with the enchanting, amazingly capable creature toiling there. She felt very lucky indeed. Quietly, Shepard padded to the space just behind the asari and enveloped her in a gentle embrace, kissing the sensitive folds on her neck, intoxicated by the soft warmth and fragrance of her bondmate. “Are you dealing with a pressing issue, my dear Shadow Broker?”

Liara leaned back into the Commander's warm presence turning her head for a quick kiss. “It seems that I have more than one.” A little smile of contentment graced her mouth as her lithe body relaxed and melted into the N7's embrace. “What did Tevos want with you?” The Shadow Broker missed very little aboard the Normandy or anywhere else for that matter.

“To request a meeting on the Citadel. She was vague about the particulars and she seemed a bit nervous. Said she has some useful information for me, but to be honest I'm not sure what it's about.” Helpless against the lure, the Spectre nuzzled further into the asari's exquisite neck.

Cocking her head to give Jane's wandering lips room to roam she made her report. “It is likely that she is concerned, as am I, about the rumors of Reaper encroachment on the homeworld. I'm worried, Shepard. We know they've taken Dekunna. I've been searching for coordinates for Reaper activity nearby. But there doesn't seem to be any reliable data."

Liara's face tensed as she continued, Shepard sharing her view of the monitors from over her shoulder. "Asari commando units are very capable, but it is an understatement to point out that the strategies they employ would be virtually ineffective against a full scale invasion. As my father pointed out so colorfully, “as useful as tits on a hanar.” Without allies, or a major miracle, the Reapers are likely on course to rapidly take Thessia.”

Stepping back a pace, Jane massaged the maiden's shoulders. “I'm worried too, but we won't let them take your home without a fight, Liara. If we could just figure out what the damn Catalyst is we could end this for everyone.”

“That is precisely the major miracle I was speaking of...along with the knowledge of how to use it...and exactly what it does.” Liara pivoted in Shepard's arms, head bowed, her usual radiance subdued, rubbing her hands over the sleeves of her lab coat as if she were chilled. “At any rate, it will be interesting to see what the Councilor has in mind”.

Lifting the maiden's chin and gathering her close, Shepard appraised the shining blue eyes gazing at her, addressing the tension and fatigue reflected in them while gently stroking a soft cheek. “We won't really know anything until I meet with Tevos. In the mean time, we're both overworked and in need of food, a shower and some rest. Something tells me that whatever the Councilor wants, we'll need to be at the top of our game when it comes out. So...instead of spending the next few hours staring at your terminal and guessing...let's regroup together.”

Furrowing her eyebrows, Liara's captivating blue eyes narrowed teasingly. “Are you suggesting that I have body odor, Commander?”

Shepard shrugged and flashed a grin. “No, in fact _you_ smell divine, Doctor. However, I am heading from barely tolerable into the realm of kroganish _very_ quickly. Because I am so very happy that you have agreed to share my life...and _my_ bed, I think a shower is the very least I can do.”

The maiden softly laughed, her eyes sparkling impishly. “There are some who find the scent of krogan delightful."

"Yeah," Shepard responded with a mock grimace. "Your grandmother, almost certainly Aethyta, and definitely other krogan." Smirking, she continued her complaint. "I know Wrex flirts with you incessantly, but honestly...well he's a bit stinky, don't you think?"

Wrinkling her dainty nose in distaste, Liara looked thoughtful. "I suppose that's true. Wrex is charming in his own special way, but being too close for too long isn't a particularly pleasant thought." Drawing her soft, dark lips into a sensual smile, she finished with a theatrical sigh. "Since you've made such a compelling argument I suppose I should assist you with your mission.”

Shepard snorted softly and playfully rolled her eyes. “Yes, we marines hold cleanliness in the highest regard. It would be an honor to have your talent and skill at the ready. Although I really think this is just an excuse for you to get your hands on my body.”

“So attractive...and perceptive you are. However, I think we had better get a quick meal before we go to _our_ bed. You, my brave commander, are going to need quite a bit of energy to accomplish _your_ mission.” Casting a smoldering glance at Shepard, she let her hips sway seductively as she started for the ship's galley.

 

 

xxx

 

 

**Normandy SR-2 - Captain's Quarters – The Loft**

Their 'mission' had proven to be quite a workout. Liara had been deliciously attentive and Shepard was relaxed. Although she had dozed a bit she had been unable to stay asleep. She thought about getting up, but couldn't bring herself to even make an attempt as she felt the asari's pliant, subtly pebbled crest resting on her shoulder, and the warm, sweet breath teasing her neck.

Over and over again, she found herself captivated by the breathtaking maiden. _Doesn't even put any conscious effort into being desirable and utterly loveable...she just is._

Shepard gazed at the closed eyes, tempted to tenderly kiss those eyelids and stroke the delicate, ebony lashes she knew were as soft as butterfly wings. She took a deep breath and relished the smell of her mate's skin, the warm, slightly herbal fragrance that reminded her of the fresh sweetgrass that grew on her grandparent's farm. She took delight in the realization that it was mixed with the cedar scent of her own body from their previous exertions. The Commander couldn't get enough of looking at her sleeping lover, at just waking up next to her.

A wave of excitement tickling her brain, she chuckled at her own incorrigible thoughts. _Looking is great_ _but the touching is totally awesome._

She'd had lovers in the past, but those relationships were fleeting and utilitarian. She'd always believed that attachment could make a soldier weak. It had been an epiphany to find that allowing herself to love Liara T'Soni had made her more of a warrior than she had ever been.

Her excursion to Therum changed her life forever. She had fallen into the sapphire pools of the trapped asari maiden's eyes and had become trapped herself. Liara inspired her. She wanted to be more and do more. She was hungry to love this passionate, amazing soul for as long as she possibly could. She craved life. She wanted the war over.

As she lay in the dark with her straying thoughts, she watched the stars streaming by through the overhead skylight in the loft. Liara stirred a bit, her refined fingers tracing a trail of warmth as she moved her hand from Shepard's neck to its favored destination on the human's breastbone. Shivering slightly from the touch, the N7 gazed at the sleeping asari, contemplating the maturity that had begun to manifest in her lovely face and supple body.

The transition from guileless asari maiden to the most powerful information broker in the galaxy had been costly for Liara. Forged by hardship, grief and the tough decisions she'd been forced to make, the shy, inexperienced, but gifted scientist she fell in love with had been augmented with confidence, an iron will, and a new assertiveness, that not only made her irresistible, but powerful.

That package offered a glimpse of who Liara might become in her matriarch years, and had allowed her to emerge as the new Shadow Broker. It had all been very difficult and she rarely spoke of it. In fact, Liara offered few complaints. Even in the face of disaster, she was still generally soft-spoken and kind. But she was also tougher than she appeared and deadly capable. The gentle maiden was still inside, still vulnerable, but only Shepard was privy to that facet of her being.

Shepard also knew that as a member of the venerable T'Soni lineage, Liara cared deeply for her people and respected the asari matriarchs. It would be trial for them both if Thessia were invaded. The Reaper invasion on Earth had been sudden and devastating. It was the stuff that fueled her nightmares and often kept her from sleep. Jane desperately wanted to protect Liara from that, but she didn't want to underestimate her either. It was important that they have balance, that they were equals. She never wanted her partner to feel inadequate or less in any way.

Benezia had nicknamed her daughter, “Little Wing”. It always made Shepard think of the quail her grandfather raised on the back porch of the old farmhouse during her childhood. The times she had been able to spend there were her most cherished memories of Earth. When she got the chance to visit, she'd delighted in holding the fluffy babies and remembered the first time her grandfather had shown her the right way to do it. Silently laughing at her own sentimentality she reminisced.

_Her grandfather's rich, resonant voice echoed in her mind as she pictured the bright eyed chick settling into her palm._

“ _Cup your hands..that's right...not too tight...now don't squeeze... she needs to be able to feel like she can move around a bit....you know, spread her little wings...good...that's right...just talk to her real gentle...let her know she's safe...just be there.”_

 _She heard her young self ask, "How do you know for sure if you're doing it right, Pappy?”_  

 _She remembered his grand smile and amused answer._ _“You'll know when she nuzzles into your hands without fighting to be free...just like she's doing now_...”

With a featherlight touch, she softly caressed her lover's brow with her thumb. _“Little Wing,”_ she thought as Liara nuzzled closer into her neck, still in deep slumber. Finding comfort in her grandfather's wisdom, Jane blinked to clear the pesky liquid she felt in the corner of her eyes. She vowed to herself that whatever happened, she would do her best to deserve the love of this amazing soul in her arms. They would get through Thessia and whatever else life might have in store for them together. She would cup her hands, but remember not to hold on too tight. Epiphany had. Resolution made. She finally joined her lover in sleep.

 

 

xxx

 

**Citadel – Human Embassies**

Although they had gotten off to a rocky start, Shepard had come to believe that Tevos was a truly decent soul and the Commander had actually developed a soft spot for the asari. There was a strange kinship in her respect for Tevos' fierce desire to protect and care for her people. In that way they were more alike than any past differences could make them.

Rounding the corner to enter the human suite, Shepard took a deep breath, rolled her shoulders and entered the Human Ambassador's office. She was greeted with a flurry of activity, no doubt due to Udina’s role in the recent attempt to take over the Citadel. Grimly, she remembered the last time she saw him. His traitorous acts had earned him death by her own hand. As she turned to a nearby turian C-Sec Officer to ask for the Councilor's whereabouts, Tevos strode into the room, issuing orders to an aide.

“I want all remaining files secured and marked for Tentron clearance only.” As the secretary hurried off, Tevos, elegantly dressed as always, turned and greeted her warmly. “Commander Shepard, thank you for coming.”

Though she stood tall and looked immaculate as ever, Shepard couldn’t miss the dark lines of fatigue rimming Tevos’s leaf green eyes. As if the war wasn’t bad enough, the attack on the Citadel had been harrowing, resulting in widespread damage and disruption, not to mention nearly costing the entire Council their lives.

She cocked an eyebrow. “Did you find something?”

“The Council has ordered a full review into Donnel Udina's activities. We're still piecing together his coup attempt.” Beckoning Shepard to join her, she pivoted gracefully and moved quietly to the balcony overlooking the Presidium Commons. “But that isn't why I asked you here.” Her voice grew hushed and she drew a ragged breath. “The situation is growing urgent for my people. We are aware your Crucible is still missing a key component.”

Stunned, the Spectre stood with her at the balcony rail. “The Catalyst. Do you know something?”

“Not exactly.” Her tone grew more subdued. “But there is an artifact on our homeworld, Thessia, known only to the highest levels of my government.”

Sensing the need for privacy, she moved closer to the asari. “What is it?”

Shifting to her omni-tool, Tevos lowered her head, quickly tapping the interface. "With any luck it is a means to help you find the Catalyst. The artifact is being kept in a temple located at these coordinates. I've ordered a scientific team to meet you there.”

Tevos looked up, but her eyes quickly slid away, refusing to maintain contact. Her fingers plucked nervously at her sleeve as she deactivated her omni-tool.

"If this artifact is so important, why keep it hidden? And why tell me now?”

“Every species in the Citadel has its secrets.” Tevos responded rapidly. “But this one, in the wrong hands, could upset the balance of power, Commander.” She made that last admission quietly.

“The Reapers are doing that now. I know you are aware of the fact that they could be within range of Thessia as we speak.” Shepard pointed out.

“Yes, they could be. In fact, it is very likely...though as unreliable as communications have been I can't be sure.” Tevos sighed heavily and finally lifted her gaze. “Until recently, I was unaware of it myself. Consider my revelation an act of repentance for not acting sooner...and personal gratitude. I owe you my life, many times over.”

Shepard understood that the asari councilor was taking a risk. “Do I want to know how you found this and what it will cost you?”

The white stripe on Tevos' lower lip twitched as she fought to keep it from quivering. “No.” She whispered.

Respecting her reticence, the Spectre thanked her with genuine warmth. “I appreciate the help, Councilor.”

Tension washed from Tevos' face when she realized the Commander's intent. “It's you who will be helping us. The Matriarchs are growing desperate. For the first time in our history, Thessia is vulnerable. For all our intellect, we are outmatched by Reaper firepower.”

Shoving her hand through her unruly hair, Shepard felt a weight settle around her neck. _The Reapers couldn't be there yet, could they?_

Gazing squarely at the Councilor she simply promised. “I'll do what I can.”

Pulling the Spectre into a gentle hug and brushing her lilac cheek lightly against Jane's, the N7 felt her relieved breath. “Whether you know it or not, you've become the sole ray of hope in a very dark night. Goddess be with you.”

 Letting Shepard go as suddenly and as silently as she had embraced her, the elegant Councilor swept back to her duties. The Spectre blew out the breath she had been unconsciously holding. _Well...there's another asari to add to the list of asari I don't want to disappoint._

 

xxx

 

**Normandy SR-2/Airlock and Cockpit**

Normally, the age old ritual of boarding the ship was accomplished via the ship's comm system. But, this time Williams met Shepard at the airlock just past the decontamination unit. Amused by Ash's desire to do things by the book, the CO of the Normandy saluted briskly. “Permission to board.”

"Permission granted, Commander." Ash proudly returned the salute, happy that the Spectre's trust in her had been restored..

“Glad some things never change, Ash.” Shepard grinned as she heard EDI's announcement. _“The Commanding Officer is on deck. Lieutenant Commander Williams stands relieved, Commander Shepard has the con.”_

Without missing a beat, Williams matched Shepard stride for stride as she made her way to the cockpit. “Joker?” She leaned toward the pilot's chair.

Impertinent grin in place, Joker swiveled his comfy chair. “At your beck and call...where to Commander?”

“Set an immediate course for Thessia and ask Javik and Liara to meet me in the cargo bay.” Turning to the sleek synthetic body in the next seat, Shepard spoke to the AI. “EDI, check tactical scans for any signs of Reaper activity in the Athena Nebula and especially near Thessia. Update me ASAP.”

“Of course, Shepard.”

“Done Commander.” The pilot airily shot back over his shoulder, “Did the councilor have something juicy for us?”

Shepard began to make her way to the hold. “You could say that. Apparently there is something in the temple at these coordinates that might be helpful in locating the Catalyst.”

“Yeah, a whole lot of prayer,” Moreau quipped irreverently, “that could come in really handy.”

Beckoning Ash to follow and sighing as she began jogging quickly to the cargo hold, she sighed thoughtfully. “More than you know, Joker...more than you can possibly imagine.”

 

xxx

 

  **Cargo Bay – Normandy SR-2**

 As Shepard and Williams entered the cargo bay, Joker hit her with the news. _“Commander, Thessia is under heavy Reaper attack! It's lit up like a Christmas tree. EDI's identified activity across most of the planet, with Reaper signatures advancing in almost every sector of the nebula.”_

 The Commander heard the elevator stop behind her just before the pilot made his announcement and knew, without looking, that Liara and Javik had arrived and clearly heard him. _And so it begins._

 She turned to face her startled bondmate as she activated her earbud. “What about the temple? Can you raise the scientists?”

 “Shepard...,” Liara began haltingly, following the Commander as she waited for Joker's reply.

 “Joker?” The Spectre paced impatiently, her boot heels thudding with each anticipatory step. “Anything?”

 “ _Negative, no luck.”_ Joker sighed with an edge of frustration. _“All channels are completely scrambled across the spectrum. QEC's completely fried . Nothing in or out. The mission's looking really dicey.”_

 “This is too important. There's no choice. It's now or never!” Her eyes contracted in agitation. “Gimme an ETA, EDI.”

 “ _ETA is 41 minutes, 22 seconds.”_

Shepard saw Liara's body begin to quake as the asari spoke. “Shepard, that's my home down there. I have to go!”

Time seemed to stand still as she reached to grip Liara's trembling hand. She wanted to embrace the concerned figure before her, but she realized what Liara needed most was her strength and resolve. “Alright. Then let's gear up! Javik, Ash, you're with us! ”

 Javik was already in armor and quickly chose a Phaeston rifle and a Carnifax pistol for the mission. After grabbing a bandolier of thermal clips, he found a crate near the shuttle and sat looking bored and sullen.

Williams stood at her locker, pulling out armor and gear, looking not entirely pleased with her collection. Shepard watched as James Vega took notice and slipped over, graciously offering Ash a newly assembled Harrier and an Indra Sniper Rifle. Ash took them almost reverently, gratitude reflected in her deep brown eyes as she nodded her thanks.

Under usual circumstances, Vega would've had a lot to say, but Jane saw that he was keeping himself in check. He had teased about the blue beauties on Thessia, but Shepard knew that Liara had wormed her way into his heart as he made his way to where they stood.

_She has a way with these big, tough guys._

James had watched Earth burn, the misery of it lingered in his agate eyes. Sharing a knowing look with Shepard, and glancing at Liara, his rugged face softened as he nodded and quietly wished them well, padding back to his workbench. "Good luck, Lola...Blue."

Shepard and Liara had lockers that were adjacent to each other and conveniently tucked in a more discreet corner of the cargo bay, allowing them a few minutes of privacy as they prepared. On past missions, the N7 had enjoyed getting prepped with Liara. They often took the opportunity to flirt and chat, a habit that calmed their nerves and gave them some small joy before embarking on whatever mission was at hand. But this time it was different.

Liara sat in silence on a little ammo crate facing her locker, changed into her compression suit, gripping the chestplate to a new set of high tech, custom Alliance armor. She'd never worn it. Its blue, gray and white finish was pristine. Not a scratch, ding or dent to be found on it anywhere. The analogy of the unblemished armor and her exposure to Thessia was not lost on Jane. She detested the idea of her lover being subjected to the destruction they would face planetside.

_Echoes of Noveria._

As Commander, Jane had the option of ordering the asari to stay aboard, but deep down she knew the decision belonged to the maiden. “Liara, I know you want to...but you don't have to do this.” She smiled gently at her, tenderly covering the slim, blue hands holding the armor.

“Yes Shepard, I do.” Liara whispered, “Joker, Ashley, James, Garrus, Wrex, Tali, you...and,” looking pointedly at the stern Prothean, “...Javik. You have all witnessed the Reapers' work in your homes. I would think less of myself if I couldn't face this.”

“I understand, but you won't face this alone.” Shepard felt the asari's hands tremble beneath her own. “We do this together...Okay?”

Liara agreed, tense eyes peering up from her bowed head. “Okay.”

They finished dressing without further conversation, checking armor closures and straps for each other with practiced motions, taking solace in the simple routine that ensured that they'd done what they could to protect one another from harm.

As they finished, Shepard broke the silence. “I have something for you.” Pulling a Paladin pistol from her locker, she inserted a clip and noisily armed it. “I know it's not a particularly romantic gift, just practical. It was going to be one of your birthday presents, but I'd feel better knowing you have it today. It's modded for weight and damage, so it's light and lethal...like you.”

A warm, sad smile on her lips, Liara took the deadly weapon. “Thank you, Commander. If it might save our lives...that makes it a very romantic gift to me.”

“My pleasure, Dr. T'Soni.” Shepard folded Liara into a gentle hug, pressing a quick, nearly chaste kiss to her indigo lips. “Use it well.”

“I intend to.” Liara made her declaration in a low, dangerous voice as she attached the pistol to the weapon clip at her hip. Jane had last heard that tone when the asari spoke to the former Shadow Broker on his ship. It was only a few moments before he breathed his last breath.


	2. Thessia Burns

**Kodiak Shuttle – On Approach to Thessia**

Just as the team finished gearing up, Joker informed them that the Normandy was in the range for the shuttle drop. Immediately, they boarded the Kodiak and got underway. As it began the descent planetside, Shepard watched as Liara sat staring at the shuttle monitor. Live feeds from the surface of Thessia relayed real time images of Reaper destroyers descending into the city below, destroying several structures with each landing leaving dust, smoke and fire in their wake.

As the Shepard watched, Liara's anxiety seemed to increase exponentially. The maiden's gloved hands were pressed tightly into her seat, making her appear as small and vulnerable as a child, every image deepening the horror on her face.

 _Gotta help her stay focused._ Moving to the cockpit doorway, out of the viewing range of the monitor, Shepard spoke up. “Liara, do you have anything more on this artifact?”

Shepard's ploy had the desired effect. The asari stood up, pulling her eyes away from the destruction below and setting her jaw. “These coordinates the Councilor gave you are for the Temple of Athame. My mother took me there once. It's several thousand years old. And for some reason it has classified government funding.”

The Spectre cocked an eyebrow. “Sounds like we're on the right trail.”

Liara's face looked like a storm cloud. “What if we're too late? My people are dying down there!”

“Your empathy is a weakness. You must numb yourself to loss.” Javik was emphatic, his four eyes boring into the asari's.

Ash spoke up, crossing her arms, a deep scowl etched into her attractive, patrician features. “That's stone cold, Javik.”

The Prothean simply glowered back at her.

Momentarily ignoring the comments, Shepard pursued her line of thought. “Benezia took you to this temple?”

Liara sounded wistful, pensive. “I was just a child. I thought it was a history lesson, but now?” She shrugged her trim shoulders. “Maybe there was more to it.”

Hand still on an overhead safety grip, Jane took a step forward. “What do you mean?”

Liara rose from her seat activating her omni-tool. An image of Benezia appeared on the amber screen. "Mother knew about this. I went digging through her old files. She had heavily encrypted records on this place from well before I was born , some dating back centuries. I still can't crack most of them.”

“Commander.” The shuttle pilot, Cortez interrupted them. “We're receiving a ship to ship hail from the captain of the Destiny Ascension. She's asking to speak with you.”

“Put her through, Lieutenant,” Shepard said, activating her omni-tool vidcom.

“ _Commander Shepard.”_ A holo of the asari flagship's distinguished commanding officer appeared over Shepard's arm.

“It's good to see you again, Captain Lidanya. What can I do for you?” The Spectre greeted her, still keeping a wary eye on Liara.

The asari matriarch sounded grateful, but solemn. _“According to Councilor Tevos, you are already doing it. As I am sure you are aware, the Reapers are mounting a heavy attack on our planet. We have been ordered to provide your shuttle with cover fire for entry, then to assist with evacuation efforts. It's futile for us to try to hold the planet alone.”_

Shepard rubbed her forehead, immediately concerned about the evac efforts. Judging from the views on the monitors time was of the essence. “Have you requested assistance from the Alliance or the Turian Hierarchy?”

“ _Yes.”_ The image wavered with static. _“Both are sending what they can spare to help but they will not arrive in time. The best we are hoping for is that they will be able to aid us in escaping with as much of our navy and as many people and resources as we can gather.”_

The “ruthless calculus of war” that Garrus had spoken of was alive and well in asari space. Speaking warrior to warrior, Shepard offered her advice in a somber voice. “I'm grateful for your assistance, but the Normandy has us covered. Go. Help your people, Captain. Fly safe...and goddess be with you all.”

“ _Thank you, Commander.”_ Clearly relieved, Lidanya gave Shepard a rare smile before cutting the transmission. _“I will remember this. If we survive, I owe you a drink...maybe two. Goddess go with you...and your crew.”_

Jane rubbed the back of her neck. “Well, that's something.” She moved back to Liara, who stood amid deck fiddling with the virtual keys on her omni-tool, still trying to hack her mother's files. “Any luck?”

The maiden sighed deeply and looked up, her eyes tense. “None at all. We're going in blind, Shepard. I don't know what we will find. If we find anything...other than Reapers.”

Shutting her eyes and pinching the bridge of her nose, the Commander tried to offer her beloved some hope. “Well, we know there's an artifact in there somewhere...Tevos is no fool. She wouldn't have risked giving us the information if she didn't believe it would be useful.”

Still hovering nearby, Javik pointedly stated. “I read your old mission reports. Your mother was indoctrinated.”

Ashley was quick to defend Liara. “Yeah, but she broke through the indoctrination just when we needed it most.”

Liara stared woodenly at the prothean as the mention took her back to the hot labs of Noveria. “Yes. We had to kill her.” She turned to the Commander. “What if Thessia faces the same fate?”

For a moment, Shepard felt like she had taken a gutshot. The memory of Benezia's death returned fresh to her mind. She glanced at her bondmate and her concern intensified as she watched the color drain from the asari's complexion, knowing that Liara was remembering it too. Determination knit her brows together. “We'll find the Catalyst and save Thessia.”

Ignoring the exchange, the Prothean glared at Liara. “Yet it did not stop you from fighting. As I said, steel yourself. Many more lives will be lost.”

Ash rolled her eyes at the Prothean as she reached her limit. “You're an insensitive bastard, Javik!”

Shepard held a hand up to both of them in warning. “We can't ignore that people are dying. The Reapers may not have mercy, but we do.”

“It is their indifference that gives them power,” Javik insisted, his voice ringing with experience.

“We are not Reapers,” Ashley boldly corrected him. “We are not like them!”

“She's right,” Shepard admonished him, glancing with concern at her bondmate. “Let's show them there's another way.”

“You're about to get your chance, Commander.” The pilot stuck his head through the cockpit doorway. “We're in the drop zone.”

The Commander gave her pilot standing orders as the shuttle hatch opened, soaring toward the planet's surface. “Cortez, drop us off, get yourself safe and be ready for a hot pick-up.”

The view from the hatch allowed the the team an unobstructed vision of hell raining from the heavens as the Reapers relentlessly attacked the planet. An unceasing sea of blazing Reaper transports, no doubt brimming with ground troops, dropped in droves on Thessia's surface amidst catastrophic destruction. Formerly graceful arches jutted like broken teeth. Wide causeways and cobbled footpaths split, rebar and concrete lifted up to expose dirt and rubble. And, everywhere there was fire. Across the entire horizon, smoke plumed and billowed from the once beautiful spires of ancient buildings. Shepard knew, though it was not readily visible, that a veritable river of blue blood flooded Thessia. The Reapers' clear intent was to obliterate every trace of asari civilization as quickly and effectively as they could.

 

xxx

 

**Thessia – Asari Commando Compound**

As the team arrived at the checkpoint coordinates, they quickly dismounted from the shuttle hatch, landing on the embankment of an asari commando position. Reaper forces were bombing the area and small arms fire sporadically sprayed over the walls. A heavy gun stood deserted on the rampart closest to the front barricade. Adjacent to it, asari commandos were struggling to keep an amethyst biotic barrier in place, protecting a handful of soldiers as they repaired the gate at the foot of a bridge leading further into the city. Asari techs were working on making a grounded gunship airworthy on the far side of the compound. And, medics were tending to the wounded in a makeshift shelter next to the most pathetic sight of all, lines of slender asari bodies positioned in ranks covered by yellow military shrouds.

Liara was the first down the incline. “This can't be happening. My home!” Her mournful voice tore at Shepard's heart.

“Ah, but it is,” Javik stated as he started after her, his voice steeped in antipathy as he spoke to Shepard.

Huffing at his comment, Ash followed the maiden with a look of genuine disgust on her face.

The Commander gave the prothean a baleful look. “Let's just get down.”

Following Liara into the compound, Shepard began searching for an officer in charge. Fallout from the incessant bombing littered the entire position. Every surface was covered in soot, and motes of ash and dirt swirled in the air. Through the dust, an aqua skinned asari with fuchsia tiger striped facial markings emerged. Her armor might have been scarlet at one time, but it was covered in an oxide haze and sported deep abrasions that spoke volumes about the ferocity of the fight in this place and its people.

“You must be Commander Shepard! We heard...” The figure's greeting was cut short by suddenly renewed Reaper bombing. An explosion shattered the gate barrier and scattered the commandos working on it. “Commander,” the figure pointed to the heavy gun on the rampart, “we'll talk later! Get on that gun and do some damage!”

Shepard was happy to oblige. As she ran to the gun, she saw commandos scrambling to shore up the barricade defenses. Over her shoulder, she directed her team. “Liara, give'em a hand with the barrier! Ash, cover the biotic squad! Javik, give me some fire support on the bridge!” She looked over the rampart and saw a Reaper barrier engine stationed at the midway point of the bridge beginning to bathe a sea of brutes and husks in shields of biotic light.

Taking out the engine in her first burst, she yelled at the Reapers, “Who's first? Come on and die you sons-of-bitches!” Gritting her teeth, her adrenaline went into full swing as she relentlessly strafed the enemy troops streaming onto the bridge. There seemed to be a never ending supply of cannon fodder as the grotesque flock continued to swarm, trying to break the commando's barrier and tear down the barricade. It was over in a few minutes, but it seemed like hours before Shepard pulverized the last trickle of husks pawing at the gate.

Although the combined efforts of the asari commandos and the Normandy team had stopped the immediate flow of Reaper ground troops, harvesters circled like vultures around the asari perimeter and continued to take potshots at the compound. Eyeing them, the Commander observed the enemy's strategy as she secured the gun and dismounted from the wall.

Her soldier's instinct had awoken with a vengeance. _They're just trying to distract us so they can make another push._

The team had just put boots on the ground but she knew that they were already running out of time. The figure approaching her knew it too. Striding purposely toward Shepard, she shouted orders to the commandos around her, “I want that gunship prepped and in the air!...Plug that hole!...and get me a location on our snipers!”

Motioning for the Spectre to follow, she introduced herself, “I'm Lieutenant Kurin. We've been told to expect you. My orders are to hold this grid at all costs.” A new barrage of enemy fire interrupted the conversation, forcing them to duck until the harvester's salvos ended. Swiftly moving toward the makeshift mortuary, the asari officer activated her omni-tool to receive a casualty report from a unit medic working to identify the victims. Looking pointedly at Shepard, Kurin continued soberly, “But our perimeter's collapsing, and I'm getting my people out of here.”

The N7 emphatically shook her head. “This is important. We need your help.”

Shifting her gaze to the ranks of her fallen commandos, Kurin gestured to them and flatly responded. “Well, unless you can give me a good reason to stay, we're not dying for a field of rubble.”

Shepard noted that the Lieutenant must not have known what Tevos sent her to find. “What exactly were you told about me?”

Kurin snorted gently. “Nothing but your name. Mission details were classified, which means we'll just die without knowing why.”

A multitude of past missions flashed through the N7's thoughts before she reacted. “I know what that's like, but you have to trust the chain of command.”

The asari lieutenant's face looked bleak as she peered into Shepard's eyes. “We don't even know if the chain still exists. So what are we doing here?”

“We're after a relic inside the Temple of Athame. It's important.”

“That's what this is all about?” Kurin scowled. “One of our outposts has been trying to reach the scientists over there, but we lost contact.” An explosion erupted near the ramparts, and she rounded on the nearby asari techs. “Get that gunship moving! Now!” She turned again to the N7. “I'm sorry, Commander. If your relic has lasted this long, then it can wait a little longer. I've lost enough people today. I'm pulling the rest of them out.”

“No.” Liara stood up from applying medi-gel to a wounded scout a few feet away and stepped close to Shepard. “If we don't get to that temple, this will be the last you ever see of Thessia. You're witnessing the extinction of our entire race, Lieutenant. This will be the end.”

Kurin swept her arm toward the vista of destruction and chaos. “And you really think you can stop all that from happening?”

Shepard offered her assurance. “We've uncovered a Prothean superweapon. It will win this war.”

“Prothean, huh? And you really think it will finish the job?” The asari officer cocked her head contemplating the possibility, but was not yet willing to commit to it.

“Yes,” Javik informed her solemnly. Stepping from behind Liara, he abruptly grasped Kurin's shoulders in his hands and 'read' her using his curious prothean ability. He stared straight into the startled Lieutenant's eyes and continued speaking, his deep voice hypnotic. “I sense that you have the lineage of a leader. A warrior's skill and cunning. They are strong in your genes. But you've grown tired of war, you're exhausted by defeat, and now you worry that you don't have the courage left to go on.”

She staggered back, gray eyes wide, pushing him away even as he released his grip on her. “By the goddess...are you?”

“Find your resolve,” he advised her. “This war can end if you do.”

Convinced at last, Kurin recovered and began rapidly leading them to the barricade gate. “I don't doubt it.” Tapping her earbud, she issued commands to her unit. “Hold your positions! I want a path carved to that temple! Outpost Tykis, we have people coming your way!”

Ash was waiting outside the open gate, Indra drawn, when they arrived. Kurin quickly gave them coordinates for the outpost and started back for the barrier. Turning to the asari leader one last time, Shepard reached out, and firmly grasping her violet hand, echoed Councilor Tevos' benediction. “Goddess go with you, Lieutenant Kurin...and thank you.” The asari nodded and disappeared behind the gate.

Signaling her team to follow, the Commander worked her way down the rubble and on to the bridge. As the gate closed behind them and the barrier went up, she heard the asari officer admonish her. “Make it count.” Then rallying her unit, she cried, “Let's make sure they know this war was won on Thessia!”

 

xxx

 

 

**Thessia – The Bridge and the City**

Since the fight in the commando's compound, there had been no sign of Reaper ground forces on the bridge. But, Shepard knew that couldn't last forever. Intermittent bombing and fireball drops of Reaper troops punctuated their steps as the Normandy's team progressed onto the bridge.

The Commander took point, glancing behind her long enough to check on her team. Javik, striding behind and to her left, held his Phaeston at the ready and kept a wary eye on the Reaper troop's last drop position. Ash had taken rearguard and was using her sniper scope to watch for new enemy movement on the perimeter.

On the right side of the bridge, Liara was privy to a panoramic view of the destruction taking place on her homeworld. The Commander knew she was having a hard time concentrating on their next objective, her eyes were locked onto something distant, no doubt her mind on memories made of her world and its people before Shepard had even been born. In a voice tinged with regret she shared. “I was here years ago. To see the city burning like this is...”

Torn between her sense of danger and the desire to comfort her distressed bondmate, Shepard meant to offer her encouragement but the words came out cold, cutting her off. “It can be rebuilt. Just worry about the next twenty meters.”

Any response Liara might have made was lost as Williams issued a warning. “Harvesters incoming! Resistance on the bridge!”

Three harvesters swooped in overhead and bombarded the building the team needed to navigate to get to the plaza leading to the outpost. As they continuing bombing the already shattered structure and the pockmarked bridge, they dropped several units of Reaper mutants directly into the ruins. In the distance, they could see more of the airborne terrors loosing fireballs brimming with even more of those monsters.

“This had to end,” Liara cried out, running to seek cover.

Javik offered his unsolicited advice as he followed her to a slab of fallen support structure on the bridge surface. “Draw strength from your anger, it will keep you alive.”

Shepard looked up and immediately saw a mass of marauders and cannibals deploying from the broken building at the far end of the bridge. “Remember that, because here they come!”

The Reaper minions commenced firing as they broke up into two groups, stepping onto the bridge and moving to each side at its far end. Javik and Ash worked in unison on the left side, the prothean throwing the attackers and Williams hitting them with disruptor fire. Shepard dropped the first cannibal to the right with a single pistol shot through the head, while Liara cast a singularity that gripped the rest. Then, the asari maiden and the N7 Sentinel each deployed a warp that exploded across the dark sun of the singularity, creating an explosion that decimated their adversaries. A lone cannibal survived the blast and stood up, mindlessly firing its hand cannon. With an air of nonchalance, Javik dispatched it quickly.

Shepard had never heard the prothean sound so happy and excited. “That's the last of them!”

Resuming point, the Commander moved rapidly into the jagged opening in the building the enemy had emerged from, her Paladin primed as she looked for stragglers. Pushing deeper into the building she called her team. “The coast is clear. Get off the bridge!”

So far, the fights had been dirty, but short. They all were experienced with fighting Reaper troops. Every member of her team had intimate knowledge of their weapons and their own abilities. They knew how and when to cover each other, how to play off of each others' strengths, and exercised excellent judgment, balancing personal initiative with the Commander's orders. Shepard privately believed they could each get an “N” designation if they were tested.

But the Reapers fought a war of attrition, rolling in like the tide, unstoppable through shear force of numbers. And, the various types of Reaper troops were all mindless killing machines endowed with unique, extremely lethal abilities. Usually there were so damn many of them, a seemingly endless supply of death. The odds of getting to the temple were definitely not on the Normandy team's side.

As the N7 and her crew waded through the remains of the structure, she internally strategized. _So where are they? Those harvesters dropped off a lot more troops than we've seen. They're not hitting us in force. Why?_

She continued thinking, as she scuttled over rubble. _These skirmishes are just wearing us down...wait...that's it. The fights have been a delaying action! They're going to hit us in a bottleneck somewhere ahead.”_ She called aloud to her second, “Ash?”

“Yes, Commander,” Ashley promptly replied, catching up to her quickly.

Shepard began to reveal her thoughts. “The Reapers are planning a surprise for us. They've been pulling troops back. I have a strong feeling that they're waiting for us at...”

“Outpost Tykis.” Williams finished her thought for for her. “I wondered too.”

“Yeah,” Shepard confirmed, gesturing to a balcony entrance just ahead. “When we get to the other side of this plaza, we're going to stop and recharge. We'll have to make it quick, but I want us all to chow down a ration tube, hydrate and do a weapons check.”

“A break would be good, Commander. I've got enough to share with Javik.” Ash cast a concerned glance at the scientist. “I know you need to check on Liara. She's fighting hard, but this has to be taking its toll on her. Seeing this done to Earth about killed me.”

"Yeah.” Glancing at the increasingly tormented features of the maiden, the N7 agreed. Setting a quick pace, she moved onto the balcony landing, her team close on her heels.

On the roof of an adjacent building, a team of asari commandos were firing on a duo of harvesters. Shepard's experienced mind observed the vignette. _Like bees stinging a bear._

Liara saw them as well. “On that building. We've got fire support!” The hopeful words had no sooner cleared her tongue than the harvesters fired in earnest on the commandos and soundly took them out in only a half dozen rounds. “No!...damn them!” She cried out in despair as the broken asari bodies tumbled to the ground below.

Shepard knew the team was exposed. “Get to cover, all of you!” She commanded her shaken lover brusquely, “You too, Liara!” Grabbing the doctor's arm, she attempted to pull the maiden into cover, but Liara didn't act as though she even felt it.

She stood mesmerized, horror in her eyes, her gaze shifting from the roof to the floor of the plaza. Following her line of sight, Shepard saw what had captured the stricken maiden's attention. A group of cannibals were living up to their name, feasting greedily on the asari dead that lay below them.

The sight was sickening. A vision of Liara lying there, those monsters surrounding her, flashed through Shepard's thoughts, bringing a wave of agony and terror to the N7. Giving Liara's arm a firm tug, she finally got her bondmate into a crouched position beside her, behind the safety of the solid balcony rail.

Concerned for the maiden's condition, Jane made an effort to break the terrifying spell. “Keep your focus, T'Soni,” she hissed.

Liara snapped out of it. Her eyes shifted from horror to rage and she grit her teeth fiercely. “Those things are slaughtering my people!”

“Then avenge their loss.” Javik interrupted them from nearby, his multiple eyes scanning the perimeter.

Ash cautiously sidled up and whispered conspiratorially to Liara. “I hate to admit it, but he's right. How 'bout we return the favor?”

Nodding in the affirmative, the asari recovered just in time. The plaza below began to fill with a unit of cannibals being led by marauders. One of the marauders sensed the team and growled orders to its troops, releasing the formula that strengthened Reaper health. The mutants opened fire on the balcony.

“Ash, take that thing out!” Shepard gestured at the lead turian-Reaper hybrid. Williams quickly got a fix and grimacing, rapidly obliged with a perfect shot between the beast's eyes. “Excellent! Now let's push them back and send them to hell!"

The enemy sent an unceasing barrage of weapons fire at them. Using fallen facades and pillars for cover, the team fought their way across the plaza. The Reapers tried flanking them, but the seasoned fighters caught on quickly and gave Ash the cover fire necessary to pick off the group making the effort. Working together, they soon brought the enemies engaged in the frontal assault down. The fight was short, but hotter than any they'd seen so far. The team moved cautiously through the center of the once lovely park.

With the lull in fighting they took the opportunity to survey their surroundings. The pathway that led to Outpost Tykis was blocked by massive pieces of fallen concrete and building materials, and the high stone walls around the perimeter stood intact without a gate in sight. They were effectively penned in on all sides.

Liara squinted at the darkened pillars on the opposite side of the once lovely plaza and pointed to a threshold. “That door ahead. That's our way out of this mess.” Hope stirred in her voice.

As the N7 began to respond, a streak of fire dropped directly in front of the threshold and an unholy wail echoed through the plaza. A tall, lumbering figure glowing with biotic potential appeared and began advancing on the team rapidly. In its wake, a unit of marauders took cover and let loose with their lethal weapons. Shepard's team scattered to safety, firing on the banshee's henchmen.

“Another mutant asari! A good fight!” Javik cackled, reloading his rifle and taking aim at the menace.

The prothean frowned as The Commander corrected his course. “Ash, Javik! Concentrate fire on the marauders!” She bent her head to where Liara was hunkered down next to her and with a nod of her head toward the gruesome giant, somberly suggested, “Together?”

“Yes, Commander... together.” The asari maiden answered confidently but her face was pale with fear.

The couple attacked the monster as one, Liara sending a steady supply of source powers while Shepard followed up with a rapid succession of biotic detonators. They ferociously whittled away at the abomination with their pistols during recharges, finally bringing the abhorrence crashing down into a pile of residue and smoke.

Against Williams' grenades and her Harrier, and Javik's dark channel abilities, the marauders backing the fearsome asari mutant fared no better. Though they could hear explosions and gunfire in the distance, the perimeter was clear and there was no further sign of Reaper activity in the immediate vicinity.

As Shepard looked her team over, she was relieved that no one was wounded. But, she could see that they were beginning to show signs of battle stress. The journey so far had not been all that long, but the struggle had been costly. She felt ragged and way older than her age. It was time for that break she had mentioned to Ash. If they could manage to find shelter long enough for one.

 

xxx

 

 

**Thessia – A Respite and the Sniper's Nest**

The team made its way to the threshold Liara had observed earlier, which fortunately housed a locked door. Readying her omnitool to hack the lock and looking at her crew, Shepard warned them. “Be ready for anything.”

They nodded in acquiescence and readied their weapons as she began. In only a few moments the door was unlocked and she slipped forward into the darkness, activating the lightbeam on her weapon. There were no signs of Reaper servants within what she discovered to be a small ruined alcove, and the only thing in front of them was another, easily watched, locked door.

Turning to address her squad, the Commander heard Liara speaking, her voice quivering. “I still can't face those things...my own people.”

Javik shrugged as if it was old news. “When we fought the Reapers they turned our own children against us. They assumed we would hesitate to kill them.”

Revolted at the thought of such a thing, Shepard pursued it. “Did you?”

Shifting his slitted eyes toward the N7 he asked, “What answer would you prefer?”

Liara answered flatly. “None. Let's just stop talking about this.”

Locking the door behind him, Javik was the last to enter the temporary refuge they found. His part in the recent conversation had been unsettling. Since his own race had been used to manufacture the Reaper mutants known as collectors, Shepard wondered at his inability to find any empathy for Liara's reaction to the banshees.

She knew the intransigent prothean had good reason to be angry. He had been born into a world torn apart by the Reaper harvest and lived to see the extinction of his race. It was hard to imagine the loneliness of knowing he was the last living being of his civilization. However, his surliness toward the asari, particularly under the circumstances they now faced, was beginning to wear on her sympathy for his plight. She thought about reprimanding him, but Liara was strong willed and likely wouldn't have appreciated her interference. As an afterthought, she decided to just keep an eye on the situation for the present.

“This looks like a good place for a breather.” Shepard stopped, a potent mix of hunger, anxiety and irritation causing her stomach to rumble. “Eat a ration tube, take in some water and go over your weapons. We've got one final push and I have every reason to believe that we're walking into an ambush. The Reapers have been holding out on us, so I expect we'll be taking on an army of them somewhere near the outpost.”

Ash and Javik sat together, hunkered down by a an old computer console, quietly complying with their leader's orders. Liara followed Jane to a worn looking crate near the exit, where they both sat, their thighs in painfully close proximity. The two ate in silence, cautiously glancing at one another as if something might break if either one spoke.

“Are you all right, Shepard?” Liara broke the silence in a hushed tone, her face so full of tension that her auditory folds were nearly smooth.

Rubbing her hand across her grimy face and looking directly into the strained blue eyes lifted to her, Jane growled. “You're the one seeing all of this happening to your home and you want to know how I am?”

“Goddess...you're so angry with me,” Liara whispered, tears pooling on her lashes. “Here...on the plaza...back on the bridge.”

Moved by the desolation on her beloved's face and sorry for her terse words, she reached out and brushed an errant teardrop from Liara's refined nose, letting her hand linger on her soft, blue cheek.

“No.” Jane's voice gentled, her eyes softened. “I'm not angry with you...I'm angry about all this. I'm just so, so sorry you have to see this. I never wanted this for you.”

“I know.” The beautiful asari spoke in a voice as warm as summer wind, leaning into Jane's caress. “I'm sorry, Shepard. I don't think I've ever felt like this. I can't even begin to sort through it all. I've always believed that I am strong. I...I feel like I'm breaking.”

In that moment, all Shepard wanted was to take Liara in her arms and make all of the ugliness and pain go away. But, she knew realistically there was no way to protect her beloved from this. All she could do was be there.

“Liara, we'll get through this...just hold on a bit longer. Don't let this take your will to fight.” Her voice full of conviction, she leaned close. “We _are_ going to get to the temple. We _will_ find that artifact and the Crucible _will_ be built. We _can_ do this.

“I want to believe that. It's just...I've left so many of my people behind knowing that they will very likely die today...and I know we'll leave many more. They don't deserve this.” Liara's eyes were dulled, despair etched into her lovely features. Momentarily, she leaned into Shepard's shoulder as she tenderly stroked her back trying to offer her lover some comfort.

Abruptly, Liara pulled away and stood up, brushed at the seat of her greaves, and in a voice wavering with sorrow urged Jane up. “Perhaps we should get to it.”

Shepard had never heard the tone of resignation present in her partner's voice. “Yeah.” She groaned as she hefted her tired body to its feet. Concerned that she hadn't been able to encourage her troubled bondmate and worried for her safety, Jane made a request. “Just do me a favor. Try to stay focused...don't take any unnecessary risks, okay?”

Nodding placidly as she hacked the locked door, Liara stood aside to let the Commander investigate the new view. Another balcony led down into what was once an open street area, darkened except for small piles of rubble being consumed by miniature flames. It might have been a park or a marketplace, but it was in shambles and the only open path through it trailed down some stairs to a debris laden ramp leading up the side of yet another ruined building. Listening for enemy movement, she could hear a firefight the next street over.

As Shepard peered through the dim light of the street below searching for signs of their adversaries, Liara called out in warning. “Above us!”

The commander's stomach lurched as she swung her gaze to the heavens in time to watch as a Reaper ship, taller than ten skyscrapers speared into the city several blocks away. Its tentacled feet immediately began moving, leaving swaths of ruin in their wake. As it moved, it fired indiscriminately, the scarlet beams from its powerful cannon disintegrating eons of asari architectural endeavors and culture.

“A Reaper capital ship.” Javik seemed amused as he turned to Liara. “You should be honored, asari. They only send the best against those they hate most.”

Bucking up, Liara sarcastically quipped back. “Did you feel honored?”

Preening, the prothean chuckled grimly. “I remember seeing one for the first time. My people stopped believing in devils. They changed their mind when the Reapers arrived.”

“Well, I for one would really like to take one of those down.” Ash wished aloud, watching as the gigantic machine rapidly began moving away from the team and the temple coordinates.

“Not today, Williams.” Shepard sighed in relief at the sight of the Reaper's retreat. “I forgot to bring my ladar...oh yeah, and the quarian fleet. Guess we'll all just have to be happy that it's got business elsewhere. At any rate, we need to get moving.”

Javik noticed movement across from them. “Ahead to the left. Snipers on the balcony.”

“They're asari,” Liara observed, her keen eyes adjusting to the dim light. “We might be able to reach them.”

Spying an incline across from her, the Commander prepared to move. “I'm scouting ahead. I'll signal when I make it to that ramp. In the mean time, keep your eyes open and your asses covered.”

Flashing an encouraging smile at Liara, she primed her pistol, activated the scanner on her omnitool, and started making her way down the stairway. Descending as quickly as she dared, she saw evidence of earlier action. No life signs emitted from among the heaps of asari and Reaper bodies in the street, only the metallic tang of blood and the sight of gracile figures grappling with the enemy in death as they had in life. Some of the victims had been civilians, judging by the clothing and size of some of the sad figures.

Memories of the carnage on Elysium invaded her brain and Shepard had to look away as the bile rose in her throat. Midway across the open area, she spied two cannibals living up to their name and put them out of her misery. _Two less Liara will see._ Checking her GPS, Shepard was relieved to discover that the outpost was only another block away.

As the N7 approached the base of the ramp, she could hear a firefight raging on the far side of the sniper's perch. The asari had chosen their site well. The nest was situated on a balcony with defensible approaches to either side and heavy cover facing the enemy. Signaling the rest of her crew to join her as she began to advance, she climbed to the entrance of the nest. As she drew closer, she was privy to ongoing radio chatter.

One of the snipers was reporting in. “This is Specialist Cayla. Specialist Jineva was just killed by enemy fire.”

“ _What's your situation?”_ The voice of Lieutenant Kurin crackled over the comm.

“Enemy forces have tripled in strength. I'm cut off from Outpost Tykis,” the harassed sniper responded.

“ _What about Shepard?”_ Kurin asked, just as the Commander vaulted over the nest's barricade and into a crouch by the commando.

Recognizing the Spectre, Cayla replied, sighing with relief. “Shepard just arrived.”

The commando's relief was short lived as enemy fire picked up, a hail of shots raining on the perch. “Watch your heads!” The sniper warned the team as Liara, Javik and Ash joined them, ducking as they crept into the nest.

As her team joined the commandos in returning fire at the enemy, Shepard risked a quick look over the balcony wall, rapidly assessing the Reaper position. For once, her side had the advantage. She could see a glowing purple barrier engine wedged into a far wall of the courtyard below, with husks, cannibals and marauders making a push through a breach in the same wall. But, the asari sniper unit had managed to sabotage all of the other access points in or out of the perimeter creating a very effective trap for their adversaries. That kill zone was good news because the only way to their destination was through that breach in the courtyard wall. If they could stave off this Reaper effort, they could get to the outpost.

“How long can you hold out?” Shepard asked Cayla.

“Now that you're here, as long as it takes!” The sniper's grim confidence was written in her face. “Can you really win this war?”

“We get to that temple and the Reapers are history.”

Grinning, Cayla gestured to a nearby supply stack. “Then grab some gear if you need it and let's do some damage.”

Shepard reached into the pile of abandoned weapons and borrowed a powerful Widow sniper rifle. Still looking at the Specialist, she loaded a thermal clip into the magazine and in one swift move ratcheted the Reaper engine. As the blackened flotsam from the engine rained on the Reaper unit below, she grinned back at the commando and issued orders “Let's do this people! Don't let up!”

Several waves of Reaper minions pushed through the breach, but the combined efforts of the Normandy ground team and the skilled asari sniper unit made an efficient end to them. It was time to move.

Cayla was breathing hard as she encouraged Shepard. “Outpost Tykis isn't far from here, we can cover you!” She urged the N7 to take advantage of the opportunity. “Go! That's the last of them. Get moving, Commander!”

Turning to her crew's positions on the balcony, Jane called to them. “You heard the lady! Let's move!”

She nodded to Cayla as the team gathered and they moved off of the perch, her voice warm with gratitude. “Thanks.”

Liara spied a path beyond the breach, the Reaper capital ship looming in the distance. “Toward the Reaper,” she shouted. “It's a way out of here!”

Wryly, Javik commented, “You have an interesting concept of escape!”

Ruffling, her feet carrying her to the path, the maiden shot back. “No choice!”

 

xxx

 

  **Thessia – Outpost Tykis and the Push to the Temple of Athame**

As one, Shepard and her team moved swiftly through the courtyard and into the breach. Passing it, they stepped onto a platform situated in a series of terraces leading to the base of the now visible prize, the Temple of Athame. Once again they were treated to a vista of the burning city, the sky filled with harvesters dropping off their deadly caches of Reaper troops, bombarding a small band of asari commandos on a distant platform.

Setting a fast pace, the N7 pelted up the terraces toward the commandos. As she ran, she heard Liara give voice to her worries. “This nightmare never ends!”

Glancing over her shoulder, Shepard countered her doubts. “The hell it won't! We find that artifact and we can all wake up!”

“Amen to that, Skipper! Feels like we've been fighting Reapers forever.” Close on her leader's heels, Ash was ready to see this through.

Javik grumbled under his breath, lagging a bit behind. “Fifty thousand years later.”

Drawing even with the Commander, Liara's voice was overwhelmed with grief. “This can't be the last I see of Thessia. We have to get to that temple, Shepard!”

Shepard's response was to run faster, quickly covering the ground separating the team from the commandos in front of them. A newly breached threshold loomed ahead creating a jagged portico in the wall. Through it, the Spectre could see that it was swarming with Reaper troops. Their enemies were holding position in the debris behind the wall, pouring firepower through at the asari on the opposite side. As the team arrived, returning fire, they managed to buy themselves a short respite. But of the band of asari commandos, only one remained standing.

Breathing hard, Shepard approached the lone soldier on the terrace. “We're trying to reach Outpost Tykis.”

“You're looking at it.” The weary asari introduced herself, “Specialist Aello at your service.”

“What about the rest of your squad?” Shepard wondered if the handful of commandos she'd seen were all that were sent.

Aello motioned to the temple approach. “They're all dead. We tried punching through to the scientists, but...I'm all that's left.”

Though the team had managed to beat the first wave of Reaper troops back, more were taking the place of their dead colleagues, resuming fire on the asari position. It was only a short matter of time before the position would be overrun. Judging from the number of harvester troop drops she witnessed during their sojourn to Tykis, and the ones she was witnessing even as they spoke, the Reapers were in the middle of the ambush she and Williams had predicted earlier. This was going to get very messy, very quickly. Unless they could find some assistance, the temple approach was going to be too full of Reaper troops to get through alive.

“What about reinforcements?” Shepard asked hopefully, popping off rounds at the enemy as she spoke.

The commando cocked her head. “We had gunships flying support, but things got too hot with that Reaper ship. They can't chance it.”

Without those gunships, the N7 knew they'd never get to the temple. “I know it's rough, but I don't see another way in without their help.”

The petite asari growled. “Have I told you how much I hate this war?” Aello pressed her earbud comm. “Talon Swarm, this is Outpost Tykis! Is anybody left on this frequency? We are in need of immediate air support! Commander Shepard is here.”

In an instant she got a reply. _“Copy! This is Talon One. I'm on the way!”_ Then a heartbeat later another pilot's voice came through, _“Talon Five inbound!”_

The gunships roared into view overhead, weapons bristling just as a new wave of enemy reinforcements rushed over the approach. This drop included the addition of ravagers and husks. Any Reaper was dangerous, but this combination was especially deadly. The husks performed their mindless duties well, engaging their targets in hand to hand combat to distract their victims, making them easy prey for the ravager's accurate, head-mounted cannon fire. Anyone lucky enough to escape the rachni mutant's blast, was picked off by supporting marauders and cannibals.

Without hesitation, the airborne artillery deployed a storm of heavy machine gun fire at the Reaper units, mowing down most of the husks, marauders and cannibals. Ravagers melted into sticky, acidic heaps but not before one of them managed to get a lock on Talon One. The dying ground cannon managed to hit the gunship, blowing out its stabilizer and sending it crashing into the planet's surface several hundred meters below Outpost Tykis. The sound of the impact left no doubt as to the fate of the ship and its crew.

Shepard didn't need a bird's eye view to know more Reaper troops were coming, but Talon Five confirmed it. _“Commander, whatever you're going to do, you better do it now! More hostiles are headed our way!”_

The signature scream of a banshee echoed in the portico walls beyond the threshold as it shuffled over the rubble. More ravagers could be seen scuttling behind their gruesome leader, husks rushing to the fore to subdue the unwary. The area was teeming with a full company of marauders and cannibals, who wasted no time in opening fire on the outpost. The Normandy's crew and Talon Five began returning fire immediately.

Shepard recognized that this was the mass of reserve troops she'd expected to see. But the quantity was much higher. For the first time in her career, Shepard actually thought about retreat. Not for her own safety, but for the safety of her people.

_No. That's foolish. Odds are even that the way back is as bad as the way forward and If we don't get the Catalyst, we'll all die anyway. We've come too far to give up now!_

Shepard swept her focus to her left, catching a glimpse of Liara bathed in crackling sapphire light. A terrible beauty, fighting the Reapers with the ferocity of a feral cat. The sight inspired the Commander. She resolutely set her jaw and prepared to move.

Her decision was confirmed by the lucky talisman laying by her feet, an unused Hydra missile launcher. Hefting the oversized gun she took careful aim at the mutated asari leading the Reaper company and fired, hitting the monster in the middle of the chest for an instant kill. She dropped the discharged weapon and put her pistol and biotic skills to good use, aiding her team and the asari commando in clearing the portico and the ramp to the terrace beyond it.

As the perimeter cleared, Aello pointed at the entrance to the final temple approach. “Go Commander! I'll cover you from here,” the courageous commando promised.

Talon Five offered her encouragement as well. _“Commander Shepard, I've got your back! Let's get you to the temple!”_

With renewed confidence and a second wind, Shepard signaled her team and charged onto the incline leading to the last platform before the temple terrace. Clearing the portico, the crew moved onto the expansive platform. The area had once been an aesthetic marvel filled with fountains, benches and flora, perfect for meditation. But the graceful fountains were broken, flooding the terrace with a stream of ankle deep water, and the planters and seats had been ruined for anything other than cover. It was now a no-man's land, the battleground for their desperate attempt at gaining entrance to the Temple of Athame.

A trio of harvesters arrived with cannons flaring, loosing more of the hideous Reaper mutants. The Commander ordered her team to cover as the enemy renewed its attack. The air was so heavy with live enemy rounds it seemed impossible to work on the harvesters, but they were the first priority. A single blast from one of those deadly cannons was lethal to almost anything it hit.

Talon Five unleashed her missiles, taking one of the airborne beasts out, then switched to her heavy guns. That gave Shepard's team a chance to work on the rest. Unfortunately another harvester rushed in to take its place, harassing the asari gunship the minute it was within range.

“ _Bogey incoming! Hang tight while I shake him.”_ The asari pilot pealed away to engage in a vicious dogfight with the harvester.

Firing at the harvesters, Javik was outraged. “The Reapers have air support too! We need that pilot back!”

While the pilot was occupied with taking out the incoming harvester, Shepard and Liara deployed their well-orchestrated tactics to assist her. As the monster plummeted away in death, the gunship returned.

“ _Talon Five back in position. Let's punch a hole!”_ The gunship pounded the terrace as a swarm of marauders, husks and cannibals began to push forward.

Shepard rallied them. “Keep your heads down and give'em everything you've got!”

They were all on the verge of exhaustion, but their resolve was strong and every member of the crew threw their strength and courage into the fight. They gave better than they got from the Reapers and turned the tide to their own favor through a torrent of firepower and will.

They were finishing the last of the ravagers when they saw Talon Five shudder and heard her report. _“Damn it, another bogey!...I'm hit! My shields just took damage!”_ The gunship lurched as it was struck again. _“Talon Five going down! Repeat, Talon Five_ _going d...”_   were the last words they heard as they witnessed the pilot intentionally steer into the harvester, entangling it in the wings of the gunship. Together, the adversaries crashed from the sky in a blaze of fire and billowing smoke, punctuating the end of the firefight.

The terrace was clear as the team cautiously rose from their respective positions. Shepard stepped with Liara to the edge of the platform. Looking dolefully at the twisted wreckage far below, the maiden exhaled sharply, briefly leaning into Jane, “So much sacrifice. We have to make this worth something.”

Shifting her pistol to her left hand, Shepard put her arm around Liara's shoulders. Looking at the skyline, she saw the Reaper capital ship moving toward areas of the city that had yet to be destroyed. She hoped the inhabitants were making good use of the time the asari commandos were buying with their lives, and sent a silent prayer that they would escape to safety.

The temple terrace and its airspace wouldn't remain empty for long. The N7 lowered her arm to Liara's trim waist and together they walked toward the temple, with Ash and Javik following closely. She looked at the tired faces of her team, gratified that scrapes, bruises and a couple of nasty cuts were the only physical wounds they'd taken.

She, Ash and Javik had seen the Reaper's handiwork on their own homeworlds. It was still hard to watch, but they all knew what to expect. Though she had been present on Menae and fought the Reapers on LeSuess, this was the first time Liara had witnessed the full extent of the enemy's merciless pursuit to harvest a race and obliterate a civilization.

Jane knew, that although her partner had strength, she was struggling to persevere. The emotions warring within Liara were reflected in her every movement. The countless slices to her soul made by every atrocity she'd seen that day were bleeding unchecked. As they walked in silence to the hard won entrance of the Temple of Athame, Commander Shepard remembered Earth and bled right along with her.


	3. Finder's Keepers

**Thessia – Temple of Athame**

 

As Shepard's team approached the temple entrance it was obvious to them that it had been barricaded. The entry was sealed off with an energy barrier that appeared to be controlled by a locking mechanism on a nearby wall.

The Commander felt the seconds ticking by. “We're clear for now, but that won't last. Let's get inside.”

“Let me take a look.” Liara reached for the mechanism. “It's military grade encryption. I think I can override it.” 

“Do religion and military always mix among asari?” Javik was fixated as he watched her competent hands and mind at work.

She answered as she tinkered with the lock for moment, then activating her omnitool, neatly hacked it. “No. This is unusual. Especially since so few still follow the Athame doctrine.”

The barricade dropped instantaneously, allowing the crew to enter the temple proper. The first thing Shepard noticed was that the place felt more like a pristine museum than an active church. The light was low, but it was enough to see the layout. The ceilings were quite high, lined with graceful curved vaults. Under it, an enormous statue rose from a dais in the middle of the sanctuary with aisles radiating from it to the back of the building. 

Alabaster pews sat in a hemisphere around the giant artwork, with thick support pillars separating them from a darker alcove. That alcove in back comprised the reliquary, filled with a multitude of artifacts. The structure was obviously ancient, but it was clear that the space received regular attention. Though the air sported a slightly musky scent, the only visible dust in the place were the tiny particles in the air. 

Liara stepped towards the center aisle and cautiously shouted a greeting. “Hello? Is anyone there?”

The prothean followed her, weapon at the ready, but the temple remained silent. “Something is wrong. Your scientists should be here.”

“I know there's a war on but why would the scientists just bail like that,” Ash wondered from behind him, drawing her own weapon.

“They wouldn't,” Liara assured her. “This doesn't feel right.”

Shepard stepped up to a sword and shield displayed at the center aisle entry. “No, it doesn't. Let's take a look around. Maybe one of these artifacts is what we're looking for.” Gesturing at the objects in front of her, she addressed the maiden. “These look pretty important. Could either of these be the right thing?”

“Not very likely.” Liara examined the relics. “Those are the sword and shield of Athame. Legends say she used the shield to protect Thessia when the heavens grew angry. Our ancestors were probably misinterpreting a meteor shower. Those same myths say that she wielded the sword against the jealous gods who threatened out ancestors.”

Javik recognized the artifacts as well. “Angry heavens? No. It was an asteroid strike. We deflected it. And there were no jealous gods. Just a race called the Oravores. Thessia had vast resources. We protected you from them.”

The meaning of his words struck Liara like a brick. “You mean the protheans? But...that would imply Athame...”

“...is not what you believe her to be,” the prothean finished.

The asari cocked her head skeptically, resting her armoured hands on her supple hips. “Are you actually suggesting that your people intervened in our past?”

The prothean stood to his full height, telegraphing his sense of superiority. “It is more than a suggestion.”

Shepard was wary of where this conversation was going and stepped between them. “Let's just keep looking.”

Together they worked through the rest of the objects in the reliquary. They found two sculpted busts. Liara described them as Janiri and Lucen, two of Athame's guides. 

Scoffing, Javik rebuffed her. “They were not servants of an imaginary goddess, they were protheans.” 

Several clear cases contained manuscript fragments recounting how the asari received agriculture, biotics, mathematics and star travel. None of which were the artifact they needed to find, but all produced more commentary from Javik, who seemed more than happy to shatter Liara's understanding of her people's history and culture in a disparaging tone.

About the codices he lectured her, his mouth curled into a sneer. “We wanted your people to be able to count higher than your toes. We taught you to farm so that you would not starve. For your people to become biotics took years of genetic research. We took pity on you.”

“What you're implying...it's staggering,” Liara argued, her eyes narrowing at his rebuttal to her beliefs. “This is thousands of years of asari history in question.” 

His four reptilian slitted eyes lanced into hers. “We were here in the beginning, watching you grow. Athame was us!”

As they argued, Shepard drifted into the center of the temple and up to the raised dais. To its side, she discovered two very dead asari in white lab uniforms that appeared to be intentionally positioned, lying side by side in a pool of dark indigo blood. “I'm guessing these are the scientists.” 

Hearing her voice, Liara, Javik and Ash hurried to where she was standing. Ash bent down to more closely examine the grisly sight. “Commander, look at their throats.”

“Yeah. They've been slit,” Shepard observed, rubbing her neck. "Looks like they've been executed."

“The Reapers didn't do this.” Liara's voice was tense, wary. “We're going to have to figure this out on our own.”

“And, we're running out of time.” The Commander stepped onto the dais and stood by the solitary data terminal perched on it, making a closer inspection of the huge statue they'd viewed from the entrance. While the busts they had found earlier did, in fact, bear a strong resemblance to Javik, the statue looked more like an idealized asari. “Who's that supposed to be?” 

Liara attempted to answer calmly, crossing her arms. “It's Athame. Her image became more like ours over time.”

Dripping with accusation, the prothean raised his voice. “You mean your ancestors tried to hide the truth!”

“I'm still not willing to believe any of that's real,” the asari stubbornly countered, her face clouding with frustration.

“Then why does Athame speak Prothean?” He sounded certain as he frowned and canted his head. “There is something here. I can sense it.”

“Yeah...,” Shepard agreed, her voice distant. The N7 closed her eyes and began to feel a tingle in the sanctuary. She heard Liara talking, but she seemed far away, like she was underwater.

“In this temple?” Jane vaguely heard her bondmate speak. “I admit it is strange this place has been so well preserved. Though Athame does have great historical significance. We once believed our gods were separate from the world looking down on us. But now the asari see everything as a cosmic whole. There is a universal energy from which all things are formed...”

“There's a prothean beacon here,” Shepard interrupted her, her eyes now open and her hand extended toward the statue.

“What? Are you sure?” Liara asked, shocked at the thought.

“It's not something you forget,” Jane replied dryly, shaking off the ghastly images from past prothean visions dancing through her head.

Bewildered by the discovery, Liara's eyes grew speculative. “But why hide it?”

Ash broke her silence. “I don't know, Liara. A breakthrough here...a breakthrough there, you could easily run the galaxy.”

Javik couldn't seem resist tweaking the asari. “See. The answer is obvious. Power and influence. Your people are hoarding the knowledge of my race for their own gain.” 

Liara's scientific background had prepared her to approach problem solving and decision making from a practical, realistic perspective. Shepard had watched her mind at work and knew that her dreams, ambitions and sense of self were all grounded in that critical thinking. But, she also saw that this current revelation was taxing that ability to its greatest extent. Still unconvinced, the doctor denied the allegations vehemently. “That can't be. I can't believe my people would keep this secret.”

Grimly, Shepard cast a weary glance at the insistent prothean and her agitated bondmate. Hesitantly, she admitted, “A beacon like this could explain why the asari are so advanced.”

Javik pounced on the opportunity to further his agenda. “This temple is thousands of years old. Time enough to make serious progress.”

Whether his words were accurate or not, the bitterness of his tone definitely offended the maiden's sensibilities. Liara bristled with resentment. “That doesn't make it true.”

“You can't keep denying reality, asari!” Javik spat. “Even a small amount of data would give your species an edge.” With a feral grin he added offense. “Or, are you insulted that your government didn't involve you?”

The words might as well have been a knife. Liara's face pinched and her blue eyes heated as she drew in a tight breath. Squaring her shoulders it looked as though she might speak or lash out, but instead, she took a deep breath and bit her bottom lip.

The tension emanating from the prothean and the asari maiden was beginning to wear on Jane's nerves. Hoping to diffuse the situation, she observed, “The Mars ruins are where humanity got mass effect technology.”

The words could have been conciliatory, but Javik's accusatory tone persisted. “And we learned of it from the Inusannon, the race that came before us. It was our secret for centuries.”

“Look, we know Councilor Tevos didn't know about this until recently and she _did_ share the knowledge with us. But if it's true, the asari matriarchs should have come clean a long time ago. We might not be in this mess if they had.” Shepard sighed with frustration and returned her attention to the statue in question.

Troubled by the possibility, but still on the defensive, Liara spoke in a solemn voice. “You don't know that. We don't know what's going on here.” With a hint of despair present in her voice she continued quietly, “But, goddess, if they hid this...Shepard, we brought this on ourselves.”

All of the conjecture was driving the team to distraction. Tired of the argument and aware that it was a moot issue if they didn't get focused on the mission, the N7 took control. “You're right, Liara. We don't know what's going on here and we don't have much time to find out." Gesturing to the console by the statue and looking at her bondmate she offered direction. “See what you can get from that data terminal.”

Shepard's determined look and tone were all it took for Liara to recover. The asari stepped up to the console and activated her omnitool. Data began dancing on the virtual screen. In seconds, Liara was able to digest the information. “The few records I can access talk about tapping into Prothean data streams, reconstructing matrices...none of which I see here.” As she shared, she quickly glanced at the statue and darted her eyes around the perimeter, trying to find clues.

Javik closed his eyes, as still as the statue in front of them. Jane saw him as he detected the glow from a mural gracing the right side of the sanctuary and began confidently striding to it. “I do,” he said as he touched the center of the piece. 

The contact sparked a green light that arced from the artwork to the statue, creating a glowing strand between the two. Instinctively, Shepard gave the statue a tentative touch and the face of the sculpture immediately began radiating emerald light.

Liara stepped back, amazed and excited by the event. “By the goddess...literally,” she exclaimed, her eyes wide with discovery. “Incredible. The beacon seems to think you're a prothean, Shepard. It must be the cipher you got back on Feros years ago.”

Dryly, Javik snorted. “Or it could be the prothean standing next to you.”

The temple was still and the air heavy with expectation as Shepard glanced at the reliquary. “Ash, Javik...take the right side. Liara and I will look to the left. See if we can find any more of these connections.”

Liara looked troubled as she and Shepard made their way to the left side of the alcove. “Shepard,” she whispered, “I can't believe this whole temple is a front.”

Jane was pleased that her bondmate seemed to be accepting the truth, despite her anxiety and Javik's determined efforts to undermine her confidence. “Yeah, the best place to hide a secret is in the open. It's standard fare in military intelligence.”

The asari's eyes welled with tears. “They've been extracting data from this for centuries.” Liara swallowed hard as she admitted in a whisper. “I never knew.”

“I'm sorry.” Shepard consoled her, reaching to brush a spray of salty water from the asari's dirt smudged, troubled face. She wished that she had something more profound to offer her grieved partner, but she could feel time rushing by and knew they had to get the connections figured out. “Let's hope it doesn't take us that long.”

As the pair neared a case containing a piece of manuscript, Shepard felt another tingle. Quickly, she touched the case and felt a small jolt as another beam of light targeted the statue. 

“I'd say that one counts.” She marveled as a green spark erupted from the relic.

Javik and Ash wasted no time investigating the far side of the room. As Shepard and Liara began examining more objects in their path, the N7 looked up just in time to see the prothean stroke the sculpted bust of Janiri. Yet another light burst from the sculpture to the huge statue. 

A lattice pattern was taking shape around the sanctuary, with the three beams now focused on Athame. But, there was one more space in the web begging to be filled and Shepard saw it very clearly. The last connection had to be one of the relics on the middle aisle. Javik must have realized it as well since he and Ash immediately began making their way to the sword and the shield. Very quickly they were all gathered by the final objects.

A self-satisfied look on his insectoid features, Javik couldn't seem to resist the opportunity to jab at Liara again. “This confirms the asari owe your superiority to my people.” 

“And you owe the mass effect relays to the Reapers. How did that turn out?” She riposted.

Javik sounded mildly impressed that the maiden had the resources to produce the retort. He chuckled softly as he observed, “So. You do bite. Good. We'll need that.”

Shepard closed her eyes again and felt the same tingle as before. Blindly she reached out and felt her hand brush one of the artifacts. Opening her eyes, she saw the beam form and shoot from the place her questing finger touched Athame's shield to the giant effigy. The last connection made, the statue rumbled as it began to break. Large pieces of the face and form fell with crashing echoes to the floor below, exposing the beacon within, its data lines flashing in the low temple light.

The team hurried back to the dais, with Shepard in the lead. As the N7 reached out to place her gloved hand on the beacon, she spied the shattered base of the statue and noticed that the beacon extended well below the temple floor, like a giant iceberg. She made a mental note to keep a safe distance – the fall would be perilous. 

As her fingers brushed the onyx surface, she heard Liara's concerned promptings. “We have to hurry. This place isn't going to...” At Shepard's touch, ribbons of green light formed into a spinning sphere, dropping in front of the team. “...last very long,” the asari finished warily, activating her omnitool.

“Now we're getting somewhere.” Shepard sighed, expelling her breath, as the ball hovered in front of her.

“Obtaining chronological marker...hold...Time scale established. Post prothean cycle confirmed.” The sphere spun as it surveyed its surroundings.

“One of our computers.” Javik identified the sphere handily.

“Yeah, it looks alot like Vigil, that VI on Ilos.” Ash observed, watching Shepard closely.

The sphere lifted itself high into the vaulted ceiling, its sensors focused on the front door of the temple. As it spun in the air, a harvester flew by in the distance. Suddenly dropping back to eye level with the team, it proclaimed. “Reaper presence detected. This galactic cycle has reached its extinction terminus. Systems shutting down.”

“Hold on!” Liara shouted at it as it started to power down.

Quickly Shepard reinforced her demand. “We need answers!”

The ball of light flew toward Shepard and stopped in a holding pattern only inches from her face. “To what questions?” It inquired, glowing as it awaited her reply.

The Commander took a deep breath. “The Catalyst. We need to know what it is to finish the Crucible.” 

The Sentinel's answer seemed to momentarily satisfy the ancient computer. The sphere began to spin, coalescing into the shape of a restless prothean. “I am called “Vendetta”, an advanced construct of Pashek Vran, overseer of the project you refer to as 'Crucible' He died fighting the Reapers in the battle of Tranbir Nine.” Continuing to pace, he pointed at Shepard. “Your time is also at an end.”

“Are all protheans so grim?” Liara wondered aloud.

Shepard privately wondered about that herself, but knew that her questions had to count. She wasted no time getting to the essentials of the matter, asking about the “Crucible” and what happened in Vendetta's cycle.

The team's excitement at finally finding and activating the VI was palpable, the air thick with expectation. Shepard had to make a concerted effort to keep calm and listen as the VI began to speak. As Vendetta spoke, he explained that the “Crucible” was not finished in his time because an indoctrinated splinter group interfered, managing to sabotage the construction. 

Shepard admitted to the VI that Cerberus was currently bent on doing the same thing. Vendetta was not at all surprised, explaining that prothean studies of ages past suggested that time is cyclical - patterns repeat. That even beyond the Reaper attacks, the same conflicts arise in every cycle. He went on to explain that he believed the Reapers are only servants of the pattern, their master unknown. But, that master's intentions are certain – complete galactic annihilation.

“You now stand on that precipice,” Vendetta announced.

Though the conversation had confirmed the very suspicions she shared with her crew, Shepard was becoming impatient to get to the root of the problem. They needed this contraption to disclose the nature of the Catalyst and tell them how to get it. 

Her words were rushed as she pressed the VI. “There's still hope for this cycle. We need to _know_ what the Catalyst is. Trillions of lives are at stake.”

“Trillions of lives are always at risk. But if the Reapers have arrived to end your cycle, this discussion is too late.” It was unconcerned, its digital voice devoid of emotion.

Worried that the VI was not prepared to reveal the information she so desperately needed, the N7 raised her voice in agitation. “We can break the cycle! We found your blueprints for the Crucible – we're building it right now!”

Seemingly unaffected, Vendetta continued his lecture. “The Crucible is not of prothean design. It is the work of countless cycles reaching back millions of years. Each cycle adds to it, each improves upon it. Thus far, none have successfully defeated the Reapers with it.”

In a controlled voice, Jane pushed for more. “Then we'll be the first. _Tell_ us what the Catalyst is.”

Javik stepped next to Shepard and into Vendetta's view adding his support briskly. “Listen to the human. She can be trusted.”

The VI's attention turned to him. “I detect you are one of us. You are prothean.”

“The last. I am the final hope to avenge our people.” Javik's voice resounded with pride.

“Your mission was known to me. Do you believe this present cycle can deliver retribution?” Vendetta whirled in the dusty temple light.

Shepard found herself almost shocked when Javik firmly testified. “They have earned the right to try.”

Finally relenting, Vendetta began, “Very well. If you have followed the plans for the Crucible I will interface with your systems and assist the Catalyst to...” Suddenly, the virtual prothean whirled, looking toward the temple entry. He redirected his attention, his words hurried, “Indoctrinated presence detected. Activating security protocol.” 

True to its word, the VI began to spin and rapidly re-formed into the sphere as it first appeared, whirling to hover over the archive console on the dais. Shepard squinted, trying to glimpse the object of the VI's concern. 

Glare from the floodlight of a single, heavily armed gunship made the task difficult. A lone figure emerged from the brightness striding purposefully from the entry, up the center aisle, to the dais, where Shepard and her crew waited, weapons trained on the approaching intruder. Black mask, black armor with the gold Cerberus logo, and a monomolecular sword prominently peeking over his shoulder, Kai Leng, the Illusive Man's lieutenant, materialized from the light. 

“You...,” Shepard growled, her hackles and her pistol raised, “...you killed the scientists. What do you want?”

“Your attention.” Responding with a haughty grin, he reached into his garb and released a silver holovid sphere. “Someone would like to talk with you.”

The small device hovered in midair as Leng activated his omnitool and stepped aside, revealing a holographic image of the Illusive Man. Facing the Commander, the image greeted her with familiarity. “Shepard.”

The N7 fought an inner battle to keep her emotions in check and her thoughts collected. “How did you find this place?”

Shrugging, he baited her. “The Archives. Or did your Shadow Broker miss that one?”

Aiming her Paladin between the eyes of the holo, she rebuked him with a confident, dangerous edge to her voice. “Show yourself. I _promise_ I won't miss.”

“Stick to your talents, Dr. T'Soni. You've helped uncover the key to subjugating the Reapers.” The Illusive Man snorted, as the spinning ball of prothean light over the console caught his attention. Moving to the revolving green sphere, he ran his virtual hand through its emerald energy field with a look of wonder and deep satisfaction on his face.

Shepard's patience was wearing thin. Her lips compressed, she scowled and flatly denied him, “Or destroying them.”

This argument was rapidly becoming stale, and they'd had it more than once. When it came down to it, Shepard agreed with Hackett, Anderson and, not surprisingly, Javik, where the Reapers were concerned. They were merciless killing machines, with no remorse, with no pity, and only one objective – the complete eradication of all of the evolved civilizations in the galaxy. 

For her, for them, the solution was to rid themselves of the menace to all they held sacred or dear. The Reapers were machines granted sentience through nefarious means. There would be no peace treaty, they wouldn't parlay. They wouldn't, or couldn't, even truly explain why they were compelled to complete their ghastly objective. Control was no option. The power and the knowledge of the Reapers would be potentials for abuse by any corrupt authority and the threat of further indoctrination was a strong possibility as well. 

Shepard tried once again to convince the Illusive Man to work with her. But, he stubbornly insisted that controlling the Reapers was the best choice. She appealed to his supposed concern for humanity and its place in the galaxy. But he arrogantly argued that he knew what was best and claimed that she was out of touch, that this was a gray area.

The Commander had in fact, considered his perspective after her confrontation with him at the Mars Archives. But she'd seen too much, knew too much, and fought the Reapers too often to be swayed. Ending the war, meant ending the Reapers.

As she argued with the Illusive Man, her team kept a watchful eye on Kai Leng. He was a skilled killer, knew every dirty trick in the book, and had no moral scruples when it came to his work. Liara, in particular, didn't allow him to escape her sight, watching him closely as he paced in front of the dais like a hungry jungle cat.

Knowing that a standoff was precipitating, Shepard tried one last time to reason with the Illusive Man. “Look, with the prothean data in this beacon, I can end this conflict, once and for all. You're either with me or against me. There's nothing gray about that.”

Resigned to her position, the Cerberus boss rubbed his forehead, his focus on the prothean VI. “No, I suppose there isn't.” Apparently bored with the conversation, his image began to walk away. As the image disappeared back into the silver sphere he commanded his lieutenant with a shake of his head. “Leng, the Commander has something I need. Please, relieve her of it. And then bring me the data.”

The holovid sphere returned to Leng, who neatly caught it and tucked it away. “Understood,” he replied to his boss, immediately springing into action.

Pulling his sword and activating his armor's shield system, Leng crouched low, prepared to attack. But Shepard's team was ready for him. Before he could go on the offensive, they unleashed every weapon and power at their disposal on him. His shields depleted almost immediately and he signaled the gunship for fire support to drive them back, giving him a chance to retreat to the rear of the temple and replenish his protection.

This lethal dance continued through several evolutions. Leng would replenish his shields, go on the offensive, taunt the team, then retreat to bolster his shields under cover of gunship fire. The team rained ammo on him from cover and Liara and Shepard shimmered with biotic light as they deployed every power they had as quickly as they could at him. But, the shield and gunship were very effective and together they were beginning to whittle down the crew's resources. Shepard tried to get a bead on the shield transmitter on the assassin's armor, but it had a hidden switch, making it impossible to permanently disable the mechanism. 

The crew continued working to wear the assassin down and soon their efforts paid off. Breaking cadence with the dance, Leng took a gambit. His voice filled with bravado, he indulged in a catcall at the Commander. “Your friend Thane died like a coward. You'll be joining him soon. You're mine now Shepard!” He then biotically launched himself from the rear of the temple to the pews the team had been using for cover. 

The muscle enhancements in his armor enabled him to snatch Ash as she stood to fire at him. With a grip enhanced by Reaper tech, he used his inhuman strength to propel her into Javik, who was rising from a crouch a short distance from her position. The enhanced throw propelled them into a bullet riddled column that cracked and fell across their bodies, pinning them to the floor of the temple.

Raised sword in hand, the assassin moved like a flash, pouncing toward Liara, lethal metal arcing to slash the asari's exposed throat. But, Shepard read his strategy and took a running dive in front of the stunned maiden, shielding her with her own body. The momentum of her tackle saved Liara a mortal wound, but the tempered, razor sharp blade caught Jane at an angle just over her left eye and slashed a river deep gash through her eyebrow, over her nose to her jawline, destroying her visor. 

Their landing left the human and the asari tangled and dazed at the foot of the dais. Wounded and enraged, Shepard brushed at the offending blood now flowing over her brow and into her eyes. Pushing herself up, she took a few steps and tripped. Raising herself to all four limbs, she tried to find the assassin through the crimson veil.

Leng wasted no time in doing his master's bidding. While the team was incapacitated, he hurried to download the VI into his omnitool. Ensuring no further interruptions, he ordered the gunship to target the temple's structural supports. With a jaunty laugh, he offered Shepard some parting sarcasm as the download was streaming, “Cerberus thanks you for all your hard work.”

Livid, the N7 stood up, her right eye cleared enough to see Leng at the archive console, the green light of the VI pouring into his omni-tool. She moved into the pews of the sanctuary to get a clear shot and began to fire at him, but the high caliber ammo just rebounded as it hit his shields. She heard a whistling sound, and looking up saw the gunship missiles zero in on the sub-floor supports. 

Liara lay helpless, unmoving where she fell, to the left-center of the beacon. Pushing more blood back with her gloved hand, Jane bolted toward the maiden, thinking to protect her, but not before the floor began to crack and give way under the impact. Shepard scrambled to get clear, but failed. The tiles beneath her broke with a resounding crack and she tumbled into the abyss below, desperately reaching out for a handhold to keep her from falling to certain death.

Liara regained her senses and began to panic when she didn't see Shepard. Though she was dizzy, she stood up on shaking legs and spied Leng retreating to the gunship awaiting him at the temple entry. Sporting a feral grin, Kai Leng sauntered almost casually down the center aisle toward the temple door.

Cautiously, but quickly, she made her way over the broken tiles looking for Shepard. She heard chips of masonry falling nearby and peeked over the edge of the cracked floor. Peering into the darkness below, she could just make out the shape of a bloody hand struggling to grip the broken edge of the floor. It was her Commander.

Liara dropped to a prone position and stretched out her arm to her bondmate. “Shepard! Hang on!” 

She felt the N7 grip her arm with preternatural might and she began to pull back with all her strength. The arm up gave Shepard the leverage to hoist her opposite arm around the maiden's neck. It was all Liara could do to hang on as the tile the Sentinel had been gripping shattered, falling to the depths below them. She felt hands around her waist and looked back, relieved to see Ash kneeling behind her, providing support to her lower body. Hanging onto her Commander, they began to inch back, as Jane clutched at her shoulder.

It felt like an eternity, but the rescue had only taken a few minutes. Liara watched as Shepard rolled onto the intact center floor, bolted upright and began to race toward the now departing gunship, more blood streaming from her fierce face as she ran. 

The maiden hurried to follow the Sentinel, witnessing her recover her Paladin from the aisle as she struggled to catch up with the assassin. But, it was too late. Anger radiated from Shepard's body as she fired round after futile round at the departing gunship, blood from the wound covering her face, neck and shoulders, pooling in her collar. The N7 brushed at the offending stream, trying to focus on the gunship's trajectory over the ruined, burning horizon of Thessia. Huffing, her ruined face contorted in pain and anger, she shipped the useless pistol.

As the rest of the team limped from the temple, Liara heard the Commander's comlink activate, making her privy to the tragedy unfolding on her war torn world.

Static intermittently interrupted the transmission. _“...anybody on this frequency? This is Lieutenant Kurin. My squad is trapped.”_

The Sentinel immediately tapped her earbud. “This is Shepard! Give us your location.”

“ _I repeat. Is anyone on this frequency?”_ The asari speaking was frantic, her desperate voice out of cadence with the cacophony of heavy gunfire echoing through the link.

The N7 tried again, speaking urgently. “We read you! Give me your...” 

Another commando's voice overlapped her efforts. “ _The Lieutenant's down! Our whole zone is collapsing! What happened to Shepard? Did they make it to the temple? I saw them...wait, I've got a Reaper inbound.”_

Liara's eyes followed Shepard's as they looked to the last known location of Lieutenant Kurin's commando unit in time to see a Reaper destroyer descend into the area, its pincher feet wide open, its targeting eye radiating a red beam, ready to destroy everything in its path.

One last asari voice echoed through the comm. _“Please, is anybody there? I...goddess, NO!”_ The voice cried out, as the comlink went dark.

Liara knew the N7 rarely cried. That for her it was an intensely private act. But the Commander looked as though she might break that rule for the commandos. Her own heart ached with the senselessness of it all, with outrage at the crime Cerberus had committed. Despite her own despair, Liara reached out her hand to compassionately caress her mate's shoulder. But Shepard dodged her, proud shoulders rounded, dirty, bloody hands covering her face. It stung the maiden for a moment, but as she watched the Sentinel's eyes wash with despair, shame and finally naked, raw anger, she knew she needed to give her partner space.

The scientist stood back as Shepard called Cortez for pick-up, her own emotions jumbled and messy. She couldn't stop the tears from flowing generously as she looked one last time at her ruined, dying home, knowing the chances of ever seeing it again were practically nil. She glanced at her injured lover, bowed with weight of not only Thessia, but the galaxy, and wondered how she could bear it all.

Benezia's death had been difficult, but the overwhelming grief, the wretched ache of all she'd seen this day made it a small thing in comparison. Liara's heart had broken and all hope seemed lost. Silently weeping she boarded the newly arrived shuttle to return to the only home she had left, feeling lonely and very alone.

 

xxx


	4. Loser's Weepers

**Kodiak Shuttle – Departing Thessia/Returning to the Normandy**

Liara gazed with glassy eyes at her teammates as they boarded the shuttle. Very little was said during the trip back to the Normandy. The team took their seats and quietly applied first aid to each others' wounds. It was a miracle that the fallen temple pillar hadn't injured Ashley or Javik more severely. The pair were lucky that the column toppled into the broken facade of the beacon, cushioning it and propping it at an angle that merely trapped them, instead of crushing them.

Physically, Shepard received the worst of it. Liara felt the small, egg-shaped bone bruise on her own forehead that was a result of Jane's lifesaving tackle. Her head and shoulder ached, but otherwise, she only sported a few abrasions. Torn between relief for not losing her head to Kai Leng's sword and guilt for the gaping injury to Jane's face, she tended her lover's wound. 

The doctor wiped her eyes and disinfected her hands, then quietly sat a med-kit on the seat by the Commander. Her hands trembled as she gently applied medi-gel to the vicious cut over Shepard's brow, cheek and jaw. Luckily it had missed her eye, but it bled copiously even with the medicine. Suffering from shock, the subdued Commander's face was hot, sticky and pale. The tissue around the wound had taken on the color of Liara's own lips from the concussion of the sword strike. The laceration was deep and looked dreadful. 

Shepard didn't flinch as Liara attended the angry mess. The maiden wondered at the human's capacity to withstand the pain and blood loss. She ached for Shepard as she looked at her lover's wounded, grimy face. Though the doctor's specialty was prothean studies, she was certain that the wound would leave a scar despite the Lazarus Project implants. Every time either of them looked at it, they would remember this day. That is, if they even had a future after this day. _I nearly lost you again today._

Liara knew that Shepard had reached her limit. She'd seen the Commander angry and in pain, but not like this. She felt the waves of it as she held the N7's head in her hands. She fervently hoped that her bondmate was not reproving herself. But she knew better. Shepard always held herself accountable. She took responsibility for every detail whenever anything went wrong and frequently gave away the credit for her own successes. 

Shepard had been magnificent in action on the planet's embattled surface. She had driven herself and the team, maintaining their focus with determination and charisma, never wavering from their objective. Despite her own towering losses and the accompanying grief, the thoughts of Jane's pure physicality and grit caused Liara to shiver with a surge of excitement and need. _You have no idea of how incredible you are._

Liara knew that force was the only one that could pull the recalcitrant factions of the galaxy together. The only one with any hope of taking the data back. _Cerberus._ The asari maiden berated herself for dropping the ball with the Mars data. _How could I have missed it? I'm supposed to be the all-powerful Shadow Broker....What a fool I am._

Finishing her ministrations, she sat as close as she dared to Shepard, who had turned away to silently fix her raptor's gaze out a porthole. Deep in thought, Liara surveyed her own emotions, noting that the array of feelings were beginning to suffocate her rationality. She felt as if she had been pulled beneath the heaving waves of a deep, tempestuous sea. Her list swelled and swiftly the review brought on a torrent of pent up grief, deep disappointment, and bitter, bitter hostility for her mother, the Matriarchs, Javik, the Reapers, Cerberus, and...herself. 

_By the goddess, how am I going to manage all of this? I have to function. Shepard needs me. I have failed her...she should hate me. And, my people! What about them? But, Shepard..._

She struggled to surface, allowing her wistful gaze to stray to the object of her errant thoughts and chastised herself for being so selfish. The asari leaned into her seat, face to the bulkhead, drawing herself up, fighting the constant tears that threatened to flow unrestrained. She needed to suppress all of this, needed to stay in control. 

Her sanity was leeching away with every sweeping wave of emotion. Covering her eyes with her hands, she began a meditation she'd used in the past, hoping to lock away the storm that raged inside. Liara T'Soni was suddenly losing it and she just couldn't let that happen.

“Commander Shepard,” she heard Cortez call from the cockpit, “we're on approach.”

Liara watched with concern as the deathly quiet Commander stood up, fever in her stormy eyes, her countenance grim and ghostly white. Looking up to catch her eye and failing, she listened to Shepard issue orders in a cold, clear voice. “When we get in, I want all of you to check in with Dr. Chakwas. Once you're cleared, get cleaned up and meet me in the War Room in one standard hour. I'll hold the debrief there with the rest of the crew.”

Liara looked one last time at Shepard as she walked careworn from the shuttle. At that moment she'd have given anything just to be alone with her. But, they had to locate Cerberus and reacquire the data. Along with that task, her lover already bore the burden of galactic survival on her back. And, she'd already been through so much. Shepard had so many responsibilities, so many people depending on her, so many worries that it overwhelmed the doctor's already stressed brain. It didn't seem right or fair to the maiden for her own concerns to heap more weight on the beleaguered Commander. She couldn't ask that of her, it was too much. Her own legs barely carrying her, the asari resolved to get through this on her own.

 

xxx

**Normandy SR-2/Cargo Hold and Med Bay**

The team followed the Commander's orders and silently dispersed once they hit the Cargo Bay. After dropping their weapons and hard suits off at their lockers, they left for the Med Bay. Shepard watched them leave as she entered preliminary report notes into the mission console and updated EDI on the team's status. 

Javik seemed to be oddly unperturbed. Ash looked like she was ready to spit fire. But, Liara looked lost, so distressed and distraught, her sapphire eyes haunted. The sorrow in those eyes made Jane's heart break, even as her own mind was filled with self-loathing and absolute hate for the Reapers and Cerberus. She rubbed at her pained face, her bare hand coming away coated in a sick pink gel, and made her way to the Med Bay.

Karin sarcastically declared Shepard's cut, “a masterful stroke”, then efficiently disinfected it and repaired the damage with heavy bonding surgical glue, several good old fashioned stitches and a generous medigel patch. The good doctor knew that Shepard was preoccupied with the day's events and didn't press her for details. Instead, she quietly provided competent, caring treatment and sent the Commander on her way. As Shepard prepared to head for her quarters, Karin strongly urged her to get some rest and to encourage Liara to do the same.

The doctor paused at the door, her cultured voice soft and kind. “Commander, I'm sorry about the mission...and Thessia. If there's anything I can do to help. Well, just let me know.” 

Shepard managed a half smile. Not trusting her voice to answer without breaking, she nodded her thanks and padded off to the loft.

 

 

xxx

 

**Normandy SR-2/The Loft**

Shepard trembled as she entered the safety of the loft and came to a stop as the door swiftly closed behind her. A quick glimpse into the cabin revealed that she was alone. 

Damn it!” She cursed, dropping to the floor, allowing herself to feel the anger coursing through her veins and the anxiety that gripped her guts like a vise. 

Jane hated to cry. She would have been mortified to shed tears in front of her crew. But here, alone, the unbidden tears couldn't be stopped anymore than the heaving sobs escaping her chest. As she sat there, immobilized with grief, she thought of everyone who was depending on her: Tevos, Anderson, Hackett, her crew, the galaxy,...her...Liara.

_Thessia is in ruins and the data is gone. Is there anything I could have done different? How am I going to face Tevos? Wait...where is Liara? God, I can't give up. There's so much to do...but, I need to talk with her. That bastard Leng almost killed her. I haven't given her the time of day since before the temple. She fought so hard...so bravely...she took care of me...did I even thank her? I have failed her miserably. How did this all go so wrong?_

Her mind reeled with a lack of cohesion. Rocking herself, Shepard allowed herself the luxury of all of two minutes to regain her composure. Then pushing up, she stumbled into the head. Gingerly, she removed her compression suit, noting the various aches and pains plaguing her body. Sighing, she remembered a line from an ancient earth movie. _“It ain't the years, it's the miles.”_

She stared into the mirror as she turned on the shower, waiting for the room to steam up. The cut across her forehead and face was a nasty one even by her own standards. _Miranda went to all that trouble to make me pretty and I went and messed up her masterpiece._

 _S_ he winced, gingerly tracing the line of thing. Chakwas told her the wound would scar. Since the Illusive Man had possession of the Catalyst, Jane wondered if she would live long enough for it to even heal. Tears came again as the thought took hold. 

She couldn't stand the thought of losing to the Reapers, of the many more deaths it would mean. And, it was unbearable to contemplate anything happening to Liara, especially in the depraved clutches of a banshee or one of the other Reaper monsters. Hundreds of terror filled scenarios danced through her head. The things she had seen on Thessia and Earth merging with the graphic, gory visions of the prothean beacon's original warning. 

“ _Get it together, N7! You're not dead yet.”_

She stepped into the hot stream of the shower and let the water wash the dirt, grime and tears away. Leaning into the bulkhead, she imagined it was rain and wished that Liara was with her.

_Probably better she isn't right now, I'd want to collapse into her...disappear into those eyes, into the wonder of her mind. Time to put on your big girl pants, Commander. Find your strength...if for nothing or no one else, for her._

Throwing her filthy compression suit into the hamper, the Commander hastily grabbed her BDUs and dressed. The hour was almost up and she needed to get with her crew. She had managed to dim her rage into a simmering boil, a vast improvement from her mindset on the shuttle ride back. And, she felt her old confidence lurking in the shadows of grief. _It's not over...not yet._

She braced herself, beginning to organize a plan. By the time she dressed, she had come up with a long “to do” list. First, she had to deliver the devastating news to Councilor Tevos. Then, she needed to debrief the crew and try to get some leads to recover the data. Last, though she really wished it could be first, she had to get with Liara. Every time she looked at her lover, the anguish and distress she saw gripped her heart. 

It worried her that Liara felt a million miles away. On the shuttle, Jane's anger had nearly burned away her other emotions. It had been a struggle to just keep it together. But remembering the look of utter despair on the maiden's beautiful face, the bruising under those remarkable blue eyes and the way Liara had huddled into her seat, made Shepard cringe with shame that she hadn't been able to keep her own emotions in check long enough to act. If Liara had been one of her baby quail, from so long ago – she would have slipped right through Jane's fingers. She resolved to make it right as she left their quarters.

 

xxx

  

**Normandy SR-2/Comm Station**

Absently noting that the crew was beginning to gather in the War Room, the Commander was occupied with thoughts of exactly what she was going to say to the Asari Councilor as she entered the privacy of the Comm Station. She was saved from the angst of initiating the call by the insistent droning of the incoming message console. Tevos was contacting her. Leaning into the console rail, she tensed and released her shoulders, then took a deep breath to clear her mind and dampen her residual anger, before pushing the accept button.

The transmission was fuzzy, full of static and buzz, as Tevos' image was displayed, her voice filled with anxiety. _“Commander Shepard, is that you?”_

“Councilor, the mission...”, the Spectre started to explain, but was cut off by more interference.

Trying again, the tensed Councilor spoke as the image finally began to clear. _“We've lost all contact with Thessia. The planet has gone dark. The last transmission we got through was to the Destiny Ascension and the allied fleets ordering a full retreat.”_

Sounding desperate, she then asked the question Shepard was loathe to answer. _“How soon will the Crucible be ready to deploy?”_

“Councilor, I wish the news was better. We didn't get the information.” Shepard rubbed her neck and peered gently at the asari leader, trying to balance her anger at Cerberus with her own uncertainties about the future.

Tevos wrapped her arms around herself as if she felt ill, her rich voice filled with shock. _“What happened?”_

“Cerberus was there. We were...we were defeated. We don't know how to finish the Crucible.” Shepard's voice lowered in an effort to keep it from wavering. 

The Councilor's regal face was crestfallen as she covered her eyes with her hands and bowed her head. _“I don't know what to say. I wish I 'd known about the temple sooner. I would've told you.”_

The Spectre felt for the refined asari. Tevos' sorrow was contagious. “I know, Councilor. I'm..I'm terribly sorry. I had no idea Cerberus knew about it." 

Shepard embraced the responsibility with a deep breath, causing her ripened anger to congeal in her guts, providing fuel for the heart of the warrior. Determined to give the councilor some hope she made a vow. "I will not give up. If I have to tear this galaxy apart myself, I'm going to find them and take it back!”

“ _If anyone can do it...it would be you, Commander.”_ Tevos took a deep breath and smiled weakly, her eyes strained with despair.

The Spectre thought of all the buildings they’d seen on the mission and fervently hoped some of the asari and their families had managed to escape the wretched planet. She knew it was a matter close to the councilor as well. “Have you talked with Captain Lidanya? Did the fleets get there in time to evacuate any of your people?”

Gaze cast down, the grief stricken Councilor softly answered her. _“Fewer than we hoped, more than we feared...but in the final analysis...only a precious few.”_

Shepard remembered the tragic last transmission she heard from the asari soldiers planetside. “What about the commando teams, Councilor? We couldn't have made it to the temple at all without them. They fought with honor and courage. I'd hoped at least some of them made it out alive.”

“ _Sadly, only a small number, Commander. A turian vessel picked up Matriarch Aethyta and her team of saboteurs, and a few were reportedly aboard the Destiny Ascension. But, I don't have an accurate count or any more names.”_ The loss of so many of her people clearly affected Tevos. As she bowed her head, the Spectre saw the beginning of tears. _“What was the situation on Thessia when you left?”_

Shepard wanted to soften the blow, but knew it was too late. The Councilor knew the score. What she was asking for was confirmation. The Commander hung her head and used the rail to support the nearly unbearable weight on her shoulders. “Deteriorating fast. The Reapers _are_ there...in strength.” 

Tevos was clearly fighting to keep her dignity. _“Then you'll excuse me. There are preparations to make...continuity of civilization to consider.”_ Her voice trailed off, she was beginning to choke up. She struggled to continue, _“We should have listened to you...acted sooner. I never thought ...this day would come.”_

“None of us did,” Shepard looked directly into Tevos' sad and weary eyes as the asari ended the transmission. “I'm...sorry.”

Jane wasn't sure if the anguished Councilor heard her last words. She knew Tevos felt the hopelessness of the situation and she had tried to give her something to cling to. But, she also knew the deep grief of knowing your homeworld had fallen. 

Shepard thought of Liara. _So much death, so many wasted lives. Councilor, I hope you have someone._

Fortunately for Tevos – she did.

 


	5. A Light in the Dark

**Normandy SR-2/War Room**

Shepard simmered with anger as she emerged from the Comm Station into the War Room proper. She had been able to stave it off for her conversation with Tevos, but it was beginning to reassert itself. To continue to maintain her self-control she shifted to full “command mode” to debrief her team. She was their leader and it was imperative that they see her determination and strength. 

When she swiftly passed to the rail of the galaxy map, the crew parted in her wake, giving her a respectful berth. Tersely, she ordered EDI to leave the system. Then, she gave the crew a hard look and called them to order. The team quickly took their places around the map depicting Thessia, lights dancing across the display as Reaper forces continued converging on the helpless planet.

Liara stood somewhat apart from the rest of the team, her gaze fixed on those lights. "Shepard...I... nobody could have predicted that Cerberus would reach Thessia before us,” she offered apologetically, bowing her head.

“It's my job to be prepared – no matter what. And now Thessia's lost, as is the data on the Catalyst.” The Commander took full responsibility for the calamity. Jane slapped her hand on the rail, staring at the map. “I'm sick of Cerberus beating us to the punch!”

“Let's kick them in the balls for a change!” Vega shouted in support.

Shepard saw Liara from the corner of her eye, looking dejected and ashamed. The N7 hoped that something would come from this that would mobilize the asari maiden. That would mobilize them all. Shutting off the depressing map view, she stated emphatically, “I'm with James. Anyone know where they're hiding?...Anyone?”

Specialist Traynor looked to EDI, who nodded encouragement to the wary marine. “Um...Well, there is something.” 

“Let's hear it, Traynor,” the Commander succinctly ordered.

Sam moved to the console, rapidly tapping the keys that brought up a strategic map of the galaxy depicting a triangulated vapor trail. “I was able to track Kai Leng's shuttle through the relay and extrapolate a destination. But, the signal disappeared in the Iera System.”

Disgusted, Shepard folded her arms across her chest. “Naturally,” she huffed.

Further explaining, Traynor's clipped accent was bright. “It's not just gone though. The signal is actively being blocked.”

That statement got the N7s attention and she dropped her defensive posture. “How?” 

The Specialist shrugged. “I'm not sure, but something is interfering with all signal activity in that region of space.”

“Commander,” EDI piped up, “the Iera System is home to Sanctuary and little else. Sanctuary is a supposed safe haven for war refugees.”

Shepard returned to her position on the rail, cocking her head in thought. “You think it's worth checking out, Traynor?” 

Drawing herself to her full height, Sam replied confidently. “Yes, Ma'am. I do.”

“If Specialist Traynor hadn't examined the data so astutely the interference would have been undetectable,” EDI added.

Restlessly, Jane ran her hand over the back of her neck as she stepped up to look Sam in the eye. “Nice work, Traynor. You've given us a shot. Now let's make sure we don't waste it.”

Ash shifted nervously. “I was stationed on Horizon in the Iera System. You were the only Cerberus presence while I was there.”

Liara had listened carefully to Traynor's lead. She appeared to be skeptical, but her voice had a shaky note of optimism as she spoke. “It's a slim lead. Let's hope it's the right one.”

Shepard needed her to be on board – she needed them _all_ on board if they were going to make a stab at this. She cooled her voice, and with steely determination, asserted every fiber of her will, “I don't care how slim the leads are at this point. We've come too far to let Cerberus stop us.” Leaning on the console, she issued her orders, defiance and determination present in her tone as she captured every eye in the room. “I want that prothean data. I want the Catalyst. No excuses. Dismissed.” 

No one could accuse Shepard of losing her focus, or her trust in the Normandy's crew. Her slowly cooling anger had made her terse, but it hadn't clouded her judgment. She still had immense faith in her team's ability to bounce back from failure and do their best. She sensed that she had gotten through as they all exited the War Room, hurrying about the business of getting to the data before it was too late.

The N7 had unfinished business as well. Glimpsing Liara as the asari trailed the rest of the team through the hatch, Jane was about to call to her to wait. But, Traynor commed her from the CIC. _“Commander, Admiral Anderson is available on vidcom.”_

Torn, she knew she had to take the call while she could. Anderson wasn't always able to get through and she wanted to talk with him. His advice would be valuable, timely...and comforting. She did an about face and returned to the Comm Room.

That decision was the right one. Shepard admired David Anderson. The Admiral always chose to do the right thing for the right reason. He was a tough, seasoned vet, his skills and perspective honed by years of fighting and leadership. Even in the face of utter failure, the man persevered. 

Jane's dad had been killed in a shuttle accident when she was still a baby. She'd never had the chance to know him. Anderson was the closest thing she'd ever had to a father figure. So, when he told her to shake it off and encouraged her to keep fighting, she took his words to heart. He promised to show her London and laughed about “it needing a new coat of paint”. It lifted her spirits and mitigated her anger into a drive to succeed. She didn't want to disappoint her mentor and friend. So, she set her jaw, more determined than ever to best Cerberus and the Reapers.

 

xxx

 

 

**Normandy SR-2/Javik's Quarters - Port Cargo Hold**

As Shepard left the War Room, she realized that the conversation with Anderson had brought her welcome relief. Her anger at Cerberus had been tempered from fire to ice, allowing her to think and plan from a more pragmatic perspective. There was nothing she could do about what had already happened, but she was free to do everything in her power to correct the problem. The wheels for that very thing were already in motion. She knew her dedicated crew was hard at work following up on Traynor's lead and she understood that sometimes being a good leader meant staying out of the way.

Resolving to check in with her crew at a later point in the shift, the Commander set her heart and mind to the next task of major importance on her list - Liara. The demands of leadership and the precarious nature of the mission had left her no choice but to watch as the maiden struggled with her emotions during that excursion into hell and its aftermath. She was immensely proud of the skill and tenacity Liara had displayed on her burning homeworld. But, she knew her lover was paying a heavy emotional price for her courage and she desperately wanted to comfort and support her.

Passing the deserted galley, she approached Liara's office door, opening it without hesitation. She walked in and looking around, saw that the scientist was not there.

“It's a pleasure to see you, Commander Shepard,” Glyph greeted her.

“Where is Dr. T'Soni?” She asked the rotating ball of light.

“Dr. T'Soni is currently visiting the Port Cargo Hold.” 

“Shit!” She exclaimed, an inkling of the Doctor's intent reeling through her brain, even as her feet were already running toward the elevator to get to the hold.

Jane had no idea about what she might find, but she knew it probably wasn't going to be pleasant. Liara was typically reserved about her opinions and abilities, but she had never been a push-over. She was quite capable of asserting her position and defending her integrity, and she took those things very seriously. Javik had insulted her over and over during the mission and Liara was probably in his quarters, quite justifiably ready to put him in his place.

The Commander came to a skidding halt just outside the port hold hatch and could hear raised voices emanating from within. She entered cautiously, and found herself in the middle of a heated argument between the asari maiden and the prothean.

Her mind obviously clouded, Liara raged, pacing in front of Javik. “Those were all lies back there!”

“They were not.” The prothean succinctly defied her, crossing his arms and scowling.

Her face darkened, her eyes hardened like diamonds, and her jaw tight, the maiden chastised him. “My people weren't animals for you to experiment on!”

“You were little more than animals in those days. You wanted to know more about your history, asari. Now you do.” Javik snarled in a chilling, menacing tone.

It pushed Liara over the edge. That was the last jibe she intended to take. Her temper gone, she began to glow with a fierce, cobalt biotic light. Leaning toward Javik, a deadly edge to her voice, she glared at him. “I have a name. It's Liara T'Soni. And I'd appreciate you using it from now on.”

Javik stood smirking at the enraged asari. It was clear to Shepard that he wasn't going to back off and Liara looked like she was ready to kill him. This had to stop. She didn't blame the maiden for being angry, but she knew Liara would later regret hurting him. “Hey! Settle down!”

The enraged asari was still glowing, the light flickering, as she defended herself. “My home was just destroyed and all he can do is gloat!”

The truth of the matter was that the Commander was done with it all too. Javik possessed talent and skill, but in the end, his arrogance and insults were too much to abide. It was bad enough that he had plied his tongue against just about every crew member on the ship, but she wouldn't let him continue down this path with Liara.

Stepping between the two opponents, she ground her eyes into Javik and made her position clear. “I understand that we disturbed your 50,000 year nap, that you lost your world, your people, your culture...everything that mattered to you. I know that our values and views are different from yours. I... Get...That. Which is why I have cut you some slack. But, hear this – I am done with your foul mood and your unnecessarily cruel words and attitude. Vengeance may be your motivation...that's fine...but the way you wield your anger against your shipmates is destructive to the morale of this crew and the mission of my ship and that is _very_ wrong.”

To Javik's credit he actually heard the finality in her words. “Would you rather I leave?”

The breath Shepard had been holding exited her body as a sigh, “No. You're a talented soldier, Javik. When you're not being an ass, you're an important asset. I'm not asking you to leave.”

All four of his eyes blinked and his appearance softened. He leaned against his work counter. “Then what is it you wish of me?”

She was finally making some headway with the stubborn being. “What I want is for you to find some balance between your feelings, your judgments, and your words and actions. Your anger is controlling you - instead of you controlling it.”

“I sense there is more to it.” He leaned forward, his expression narrowing.

The Commander decided to lay all of her cards on the table. “Yes. It is the height of arrogance for you to imply that your people gifted the peoples of this galaxy with a wealth of knowledge that we have somehow squandered. It's a damn miracle that we could even find anything useful in the rubble the Reapers left of the Prothean empire - that we could make any sense of anything. Your people _did_ help us. But the litany of truth you insist on repeating is not helpful. Liara deserves a chance to digest your past involvement with her people and make sense of it for herself. You know that she has spent the better part of her life studying the prothean civilization, caring about it. Had she chosen not to, we wouldn't have been able to piece together your warnings, or even begin to prepare - let alone build the Crucible. You told Vendetta that “we had earned the right to try”. If you believe that, then we have also earned your respect. It's up to you whether you will demonstrate that.”

“Understood,” the prothean responded, slightly bowing his head in acquiescence. “How would you have me begin, Commander?”

Shepard took a step back. Liara extinguished her biotic threat and nodded gratefully at the Sentinel, who had been worried that her bondmate wouldn't appreciate the interference. “Given what's happened today, I think you owe Liara an apology, Javik.”

Despite his cooperative posture, the prothean was puzzled. “Apologize?”

Shepard was about to enlighten him, but Liara broke in, resentment ringing in her voice, “For not doing more!” She exploded, grief pouring into her words. “You're a prothean! You were supposed to have all the answers. How could you not stop this from happening?”

Javik lowered his head and loosely crossed his arms. Peering up at the maiden, his voice dropped as he confessed. “We believed you would. Long ago we saw the potential in your people. Even then it was obvious, the wisdom...the patience. You were the best hope for this cycle. So you were _guided_ when necessary.”

The weight of that burden seemed to slam onto Liara's slim shoulders. Head bowed, she replied hoarsely, her tone low and filled with regret. “Well, it didn't work.”

Shepard watched, amazed as Javik's hard features began to soften. She sensed that the prothean understood the self-recrimination, the despair of failure, and the guilt of surviving as he encouraged her. “You're alive, aren't you? Your world may have fallen. But as long as even one asari is left standing the fight isn't over.”

Liara's expressive eyes welled with tears. Casting her gaze to the floor, she attempted reconciliation. “I guess that goes for protheans, too.”

Javik replied, his baritone adamant but almost gentle, perhaps even kind. “Despair is the enemy's greatest weapon. Do not let them wield it...Liara T'Soni.”

She nodded at him with a sad smile. Then glancing briefly at Shepard, she collected herself and quietly left the hold.

That momentary glance struck Shepard to the marrow. Liara's eyes reflected more torment, more hurt than was right for anyone to have to bear and though she wanted to go with her right then, her instincts told her to give Liara the dignity of walking away and the chance to recompose herself. 

The Commander was aware that Javik had never really apologized for his past behavior or words, but she was moved by his willingness to explain his people's actions and his expression of concern for the one she loved. “That...was unexpected. Thank you.”

The gruff prothean shifted himself up from the counter, observing. “It would be a pity to lose her. We need her talents.”

 _He really has no idea how true that is_. “Yes, we do. Did you mean any of that?”

Resuming his haughty facade, Javik quipped, “Does it matter?”

“Liara means a great deal to me...so, yes, it matters.” Shepard glanced wistfully toward the door.

Softly snorting, Javik pointedly responded, “Then I will give you the answer you wish. Yes.” Pursing his mouth and sniffing, he pointedly stated, “You and the asari are bonded.”

Their relationship was hardly a secret, the crew knew Liara had moved to the loft, but it wasn't general knowledge that they'd actually bonded. “We are. You have your anger to motivate you. I have her.”

“Then spend what time remains before our next mission with her. Your company would be welcome. In fact, she craves it. I wish to be alone to consider our conversation.” He dismissed her, casually waving his hand toward the door. 

She turned to go then, deciding to track Liara down. “I suspect that's true, Javik. I'll leave you to your thoughts.”

She heard Javik softly speak as she left the compartment. “All will be well, Commander.” 

She hoped he was right.

 


	6. Lost

**Normandy SR-2/Liara's Office**

Liara entered her office on leaden feet, feeling all of her 109 years for the first time in her life. Her government and the matriarchs had failed Thessia miserably and the asari people were paying a terrible price for it. To make matters worse, she had somehow missed the data on Vendetta in the Mars Archive and failed to entertain the possibility that Cerberus might anticipate them.

_My people are dying by the millions and I live._

She was ashamed of herself for losing control when she went to see Javik. She'd gone to him, hoping to find some reason to exonerate her government but the conversation had gone a completely different direction. It staggered her to think that her burning, Reaper infested planet had been a beacon of hope for the dying prothean race.

Her sorrow deepened at the thought of the complete failure of her enlightened government to share the one piece, in a sea of prothean information, that could actually defeat the Reapers and save the galaxy. The truth was hard to face. It made her blind with rage. If Shepard hadn't stepped in when she did, Liara was not sure of what could have happened.

_And, Shepard...she almost died today because of me._

It all hurt too much. The events she suffered through had left her brutalized and beaten. The death, the sacrifice, her burning home and the loss of the Catalyst had all been more than she could bear. Her spirit had broken with the raw emotion of all she had seen. She had to find a way to deal with the pain of it. There was work to be done and her feelings were messing with her judgment, her ability to simply act.

Liara had good friendships among the other members of the crew and knew she could have talked with them. They would have listened and understood. But, her particular need was well past the need for talking. To even begin to regain her dissolving sanity, she needed a union. It was Shepard her body, soul, spirit and mind responded to and trusted.

But, the maiden couldn't bring herself to expose the already overburdened Commander to her out of control feelings. She would have to separate herself from Shepard, painful though that might be. She would have to wall off the devastating emotions that were making her crazy, threatening to immobilize her.. To cope, to actually be of any help to anyone, especially her beloved, she had to take control. She had to _not_ feel anything. If she broke down now, she was afraid she would not recover - that she would become permanently insane.

 _Maybe after the war._ Liara closed her tearful eyes in concentration.

She had done it before _...Alchera...Illium..._ she could do it again. Taking several deep, ragged breaths, Liara asserted her will against her own emotions. She had to abate the anguish, hide it away. She had to do something. Summoning all the resistance she could muster, she meditated herself into a veiled place, a void from which she could operate.

Moments later, she stood at her terminal entirely focused on her work, asserting her reborn industry and competence. She ordered her agent network to ferret out every new secret they could find on Cerberus. She tasked EDI with re-analyzing the data from the archives to prevent any more surprises. Then, she went to work to try to help the asari refugees. She began scouting safe havens, locating food, clothing, financial resources, and arranging housing and transportation.

Liara suspected that Shepard would soon look for her. In Javik's quarters, Jane's eyes had followed her departure in such a way that the maiden had fully expected to hear her footsteps as she left the hold. But, the Commander had been gracious as always, protective of her self-respect and position.

Her suspicions were confirmed as the office door swept open and Shepard entered, coming to stand close by her side. It ached to have the Commander so near. It was going to make what she had to do very, very hard. But, her dark emotions were a threat to her lover's well-being so she prepared herself to persevere. _Just punishment for my own failure...for living when so many others aren't._

"Hello, Commander." She struggled to sound detached, and made her body rigid. "How may I help you?"

She felt Shepard's warm hand caress her shoulder. "I came to see you. I know this has been a terrible day for you. I'm sorry we weren't able to be together sooner."

As a little voice from behind her shored up mind encouraged the asari to fall into the touch, to invite more, her irrational self lectured. _I have to steel my feelings. I have failed her and I can't be of any use to her if I let myself care._ _I am a weakness for her. I can't allow myself to be with her anymore. If I can't be sane it could cost us the war...and her life._

"Yes, there has been alot to deal with, but I am fine...and I don't really have time to talk right now. Perhaps we can strategize later?" She forced herself to shrug out from beneath the comfort of Shepard's hand and escaped to her desk terminal further into the compartment. Her suggestion resounded in her own hearing as a pleasant, detached tone, touched with disinterest.

Jane followed her, but mercifully didn't initiate any further physical contact. Now that it was only the two of them, Liara was having a hard enough time not throwing herself into Shepard's strong arms.

 _Can't let myself,_ she told the lingering, sad voice inside that longed for her Commander.

"Strategize?" Shepard shrugged. "Liara...what's going on? I've watched you spin all day from everything that's happened. I _know_ you're _not_ fine." Jane pursued her, reaching for her upper arm. "What about your head? Dr. Chakwas told me that you should get some rest."

Again, shrinking from Shepard's touch and still tapping the keys on her terminal, she steeled her voice with resistance. "I _am_ fine, Commander. I am just....busy. Please, I just need time...to work. I am trying to help the refugees. They are more important to me than sleep."

"Ah...that's a great idea. What can I do to help you?" Shepard stepped painfully close, bearing a hopeful, but puzzled look.

Continuing to struggle with her unruly feelings, the scientist clamped down on them. "Nothing, thanks," she said as blithely as should could, hoping the human would take the hint. But, Shepard wasn't leaving.

Avoiding the Sentinel's gaze, she stared at her fingers, not daring to look up as she fussed. "I owe this to them. This is something I can do... _alone_. Please, Commander. I need to focus."

Shepard winced as if Liara had slapped her. The asari struggled to strengthen her resolve. Her heart ached for the distress she had just caused. But the galaxy needed the human in front of her, depended on her and the maiden had convinced herself that she would only add more burden to the Commander's already overloaded shoulders.

Her gray eyes clouded with hurt, she moved back a pace. "Okay, Liara. I'll leave you to it. But, don't stay at it too long." She sounded choked, her voice, husky and dry. "Promise me we'll talk later."

Her resolve was diminishing. She really needed for the N7 to go before she gave in to the pesky little voice inside that was drawn to the solace that was all Shepard and actively fighting her agenda.

"I'll try to make some time," Liara forced herself to say nonchalantly, still looking down.

She couldn't let the N7 see how hard this was. She knew if she even glimpsed Shepard's face she would cry, so she pushed herself to maintain her carefully constructed front until she heard the grief stricken Commander's footsteps carrying her away. Just being this close to Shepard for this short of time had been taxing. She couldn't bear to be near the human if this was going to work.

As the door closed, Dr. Liara T'Soni collapsed into her desk chair and wept uncontrollably. Lost.

 

xxx

**Normandy SR2/Crew Lounge**

_What the hell was that!_ Pain pulsed through Shepard's sore head, her face flushing with heat and pain from the confrontation.

She expected tears or maybe even a fight. She expected to have to find a way for Liara to feel her love and support, to make up. She expected to apologize for the failure. She fully expected to destroy the wall that had been growing between them before it got too tall to knock down. It was understandable that Liara would want to help her people, but she was shocked that her lover had used it as an excuse to create more distance between them.

Bewildered, she went about her rounds of the ship to keep busy. If she couldn't be with Liara, she could at least pay her crew the courtesy of checking in. After suffering through Joker's poorly timed jest about asari dancers and listening to his well intentioned speech about "taking care of her", she moved onto engineering and the cargo hold where she noted that everyone was working diligently and everything was under control.

Then, she stopped in the CIC long enough for Traynor to tell her that she'd taken the liberty of forwarding the coordinates for Sanctuary to EDI and that they were en route. The trip would take several hours since Horizon was located completely across the galaxy from their debarkation point in the Athena Nebula. For the time being all she could do was keep busy and try to keep it together.

But thoughts of Liara persisted. _How do I fix this...can I fix this?_

Jane considered going back to the cargo hold for a few rounds with Vega, but thought better of it. In its present condition her face couldn't take the abuse. _Yeah, real smart...idiot!_

Deciding that a drink would be the lesser of two evils, she headed to the crew lounge. Garrus was behind the bar filtering liquor, and Ash and Tali were relaxing on some nearby stools as she entered.

The turian looked up as Shepard approached the bar and noticed the long, angry cut over her brow. "Wow Shepard, nice one!" Garrus began trying immediately to cheer her up. "You've almost managed to out-ugly me."

Her humor was dulled, but she tried to tease back. The turian never seemed to tire of ugly mug jokes. "Yeah, Vakarian, all those lessons you gave me in leading with your face really paid off."

"I'm guessing that you're not here for my lively company." Garrus' eyes narrowed with concern.

"Nope, not this time." She pulled up a stool next to Tali. "Would you please pass me the Tyrconnell? I'll be wanting a good, long drink."

The turian obliged her with the bottle and a glass. Pouring a heavy shot, she took a belt and savored the peaty, sweet fire moistening her throat with a pleasant burn.

"Thanks." Closing her eyes, she sighed as the musky warmth of the potent Celtic whiskey spread through her body and the fresh, grassy aftertaste coated her tongue.

"You sure that stuff's any good?" The turian asked with a chuckle, lifting a bottle nearly filled with syrupy, amber liquid. "I've got some nice triple filtered turian brandy right here."

"Garrus, it's heaven in a glass. Too damn bad you're a dextro." Trying to regain her usual demeanor Jane turned to face her friends. "You guys ready to take on Cerberus?"

"You bet, Skipper." Ash smirked wickedly. "My gear, my beautiful guns and my nastiest ammo are just waiting for the chance."

"The engines and all ship's systems are running at peak efficiency," Tali purred, her veiled head tilting toward the Commander.

"And...believe it or not, the Primarch must be napping at the moment," Garrus teased, holding her eyes, examining her face. "How about you, Shepard? I have to tell you - you _do_ look like shit."

"Thanks. I _did_ learn from the best." Jane snorted, giving him a half smile.

Ash had clearly given them a blow by blow of the day's events. Tali picked up where Garrus left off, her voice sympathetic. "So much happened to you down there, it must have been very hard for you...and Liara."

Taking another swallow for fortification, Shepard answered simply, "Yeah Tali, it was."

"Shepard, I saw her coming from the elevator. She was going to her office and she passed right by me. But she acted like she didn't see me...like her body was moving without her brain." Tali reported. "That's not like her."

"Well, after Noveria, she was really upset," Ashley chimed in. "She was sad. But, she recovered really fast."

"That's a bit like comparing varren and kakliosaurs, Ash," Garrus informed her. "They're both dangerous to train, but they're two entirely different animals. Same with Noveria and Thessia. Both traumatic in completely different ways." Jane sensed that her turian big brother saw her confusion and knew that something was very wrong. He leaned toward her, talons spread on the counter, and asked gently, "Have you seen her?"

"Twice, in fact," Jane confessed, the yearning ache in her chest growing again. "The first time, she was having a 'discussion' with Javik."

"Whoa!" Williams threw up her hands in surprise, remembering the interaction of the two on Thessia. "That could not have gone well!"

"No, it did not." Jane rubbed her neck, remembering the tension. "I've seen cooler gas fires. But, they did manage to come to an understanding...I think."

Garrus pushed. "And...the second time?"

Cocking her good eyebrow at him, she prepared an answer, pouring another four fingers of the comforting, irish whiskey into the glass. "I...I don't know." She shrugged. "She didn't want to talk. Just wanted to work, said she needed to focus. I offered to help her, but...she, she was all business. I could tell she just wanted me to leave her alone."

"I've seen her do that before, Shepard." Ash looked thoughtful, a solemn note in her voice. "After well...Alchera." The marine paused for a moment. The episode was a sensitive subject. Taking a deep breath, she continued, "We all tried to comfort her. She seemed barely alive for awhile. Then, she just turned all business, as you said. And...shortly after that - she left. No one knew where she'd gone. She just took off."

Tali nodded in agreement. "Yes, Shepard. Remember Illium? Garrus and I were both there the day you found her again. She was so glad to see you at first - then, she did a complete turnaround. Started treating you like a stranger. That's alot like she's acting now."

Garrus was quick to confirm their observations. "It's true. Both times, we knew how bad a shape she was in. But, she wouldn't take any help or really talk about it. With anyone. She just suffered through it all alone."

Taking a deep breath, Ashley offered the distressed Commander some advice, her warm chestnut eyes serious, a sympathetic smile gracing her mouth. "No one should go through all of this alone, Skipper. She needs you...and you need her too. Go back, try again. The only person who can get through to her, is you."

Chucking down her drink, Shepard resisted. "She doesn't want to see me right now...and I can't bully her into wanting to, Ash."

"No, you're right about that," Garrus agreed. Then persisting, he continued, "She does need some time...but...not all of it." His gaze shifted meaningfully to Tali. "We could be facing the end of our galaxy. I know that I'm not going to waste a moment of what we might have left with any doubts hanging over _my_ head."

"So, give her some time...just don't wait too long." Tali's voice was warm as reached out to rub the Commander's arm in encouragement. Jane could hear her smile as she drew out her next words playfully, "Liara loves you, Shepard."

The maiden's rejection of her had left her twisted in knots, but she knew her friends' insights were right on target. Their observations had shed light for her on the fact that her bondmate was in such agony that she couldn't bear to share it. Perhaps she didn't even know how. Shepard's own anxiety and pain paled in comparison to Liara's. She had to find a way to bring her lover back. Liara had done that for her physically, she needed to find a way to help her bondmate do that emotionally. She wouldn't wait. With no real plan in mind, she stood up, excused herself, and took on a new mission.

 


	7. Found

**Normandy SR-2/Liara's Office**

Taking the few strides it took her long legs to get to Liara's office from the Crew Lounge, Jane swiftly entered. Except for the various monitors, the compartment was dark.

"Liara?" She peered into the dimmed room. There was no response. Apparently, the scientist had put Glyph on sleep mode.

Stepping to the vacant terminal, she anxiously commed EDI. "Where is Liara?"

Ever present, EDI responded quickly. _"Dr. T'Soni is currently in your quarters, Shepard. Should I contact her?"_

Thinking quickly, Jane decided that Liara might try to avoid her if she knew she was on her way. "No thanks, EDI. I'll see her there. That's all."

_"Very well. Logging you out Shepard."_

The Commander hurried to get to the loft. Jogging at a quick pace, she rushed into the elevator. She viciously stabbed the button for the top deck. _How come these damn things take so long when I want to get somewhere fast?_

 

xxx

 

**Normandy SR-2/The Loft**

Shepard stopped to take a breath before entering their quarters. As she paused, she entertained hope that Liara might have come to her senses and gone up to bed - _their_ bed. But upon entering the living area, it only took a glimpse to she realize how very wrong about that she was.

Liara sat very still at the foot of the bed, with an open duffel bag near her feet. A lump filled Shepard's throat as she saw that the maiden's clothes and belongings were neatly stacked within it. Those same things had been joyfully moved to the loft only a couple of weeks before - an act that had merged their separate solitudes.

The maiden's clear intention was to move out. Liara sat slumped, her vitality absent, eyes staring vacantly ahead. Her typically buoyant presence was ghostlike, thin, utterly silent. The soul Shepard loved had to be in that tattered shell, but she was going to have to look for it.

“ _Cup your hands... let her know she's safe...just be there,"_ her grandfather's words echoed.

Resisting the urge to recklessly take the bereaved asari in her arms and beg her to stay, she gingerly took the few steps necessary to stand in front of her. She swallowed hard before speaking, her voice hoarse, a subtle lift at the corner of her mouth as she probed. "Going somewhere, T'Soni?"

For a moment the asari continued to sit there, then looked directly at her bondmate, her stare vacant. "I...yes...no...I don't know." Her voice trailed off, her expression and the words devoid of emotion.

"Please, Liara...," Shepard implored feverishly, "please tell me what's going on?"

The dejected maiden's eyes filled with suffering as she answered. "I can't be near you right now, Shepard."

Jane struggled to keep her voice even and calm, to keep her body still. She sensed panic lurking beneath the asari's skin, the kind of fight or flight response wild animals have when they are alarmed. "What?...Why not?"

The asari sighed deeply, clasping her hands in her lap, her voice small and distant as she confessed bitterly. "I'm a complete fraud, Shepard. Everything I have believed... well, isn't true. I've wasted years of my life studying...living a lie."

Moving slowly, Jane carefully crouched down and taking a risk, very tenderly enclosed Liara's hands in her own. "The only real lie you're remotely responsible for is the one you're telling yourself right now. You can't take the blame for not knowing the truth. Think about what you do know that has helped."

"Perhaps," the maiden conceded, a sad, reticent little smile on her lips. "But, I should have known about Cerberus...and...you, you almost died again today. When Leng cut you...when you fell. If I just let myself be numb, I won't care too much. I will still do what I can to help. But, if I can stop caring, I won't have so much to lose." Pausing, her chin dropped to her chest. " I have failed you. I can never forgive myself for that.”

"You could _never_ fail me...not ever," Shepard insisted, beginning to understand her lover's torment. Pouring sincerity into the words, she lifted the maiden's chin to gaze into her suffering blue eyes. She chanced bringing one of her hands to the asari's passive face, gently stroking her freckled cheekbone with her thumb. "You couldn't have known Cerberus would be there. The data was missing. And, you _know_ that Leng went after you to get to me. There's no way I could have stood by and watched him murder the one person I love more than anything or anyone else. And yeah, I could have fallen in the temple and died. But _you_ saved me. I was angry about Cerberus too. But I was angry at myself, just like you are now."

Liara still held out. "But, those mistakes could cost us the war, Shepard. You deserve someone better. Someone who isn't so dense...or afraid...who doesn't make those kinds of mistakes." Jane could see that her defenses were beginning to wear down as she continued, "Damn it, I thought I was stronger than this. Goddess, I am ashamed of being so weak. I'm still as naïve as when the other children called me “pureblood” for the first time. I even believed that I could help my people escape. That somehow I could save them. I thought I could help the refugees. But, the casualty reports are staggering. Anything I have been able to accomplish is nothing compared to the number of my people who are dead or dying."

"Liara, we both have every right to feel cheated and to grieve for our people and our worlds. And, if you _weren't_ afraid...I'd actually question your sanity. Let's put the blame where it belongs, squarely at the feet of Cerberus and the Reapers. Anderson told me to shake this off. And he's right." Still working against the asari’s resistance, Shepard prompted her, gesturing eloquently between them. "Why is being near me so bad? I thought you wanted this...us."

The maiden shifted uncomfortably. "That is exactly why. I _do_ want this. I want it too much." Lifting her gaze to Shepard, her eyes strained with regret, she continued. "I'm selfish and needy. My mind is imploding from all of this and you don't deserve to be exposed to that. You, of all people, shouldn't be asked to bear it with me."

The Commander's wounded gray eyes drank in the asari. "You aren't asking for anything that you haven't already given me more times than I can count. And you've never really asked for anything in return." She pitched her voice low, but it broke anyway. "The Reapers and Cerberus need to end, but I don't want to try to do it alone...and even if we won, I don't want to live in a world without you."

The words affected the asari. Her dark lashes dampened with tears, creating a stream at her temples as she looked up. "I can't be bonded with you, Shepard. I have nothing to give you...nothing good...not anymore."

"I don't believe that...not for a minute," Shepard denied her, her contralto voice hoarse.

"But, it's true." The weeping maiden hung her head. "I don't want leave you, but I'm afraid that I have nothing left for you...no reason you should want me to stay. I feel broken beyond repair. Right now, I don't even feel like I'm _in_ my own body."

Carefully, Jane pulled Liara up, encircling the slim waist with her strong hands. "So, let me help you. Let me take some of this for you. That's what bondmates do...please."

The Commander's cautious coaxing was rewarded, she could tell that Liara's defenses were beginning to rapidly fail. The distressed maiden sighed deeply, her breath trailing. "I don't even know where to begin..."

Shepard urgently, softly, whispered past her grieved lover's last vestige of resistance. Her close, warm breath brought a shiver to the lonely asari as she pulled her into a tight embrace. "I do...just open up...let me in."

Jane witnessed the carefully constructed wall suddenly crash apart. Liara broke down in her arms, her blistering tears engulfing them both as she clung to her mate, panting a pitiful litany into the human's chest. "I'm so numb, Shepard...please...need you...I need you...here...inside...with me... _Please_...help me."

The Commander lifted her grieving lover into the safety of her arms and carried her fully onto their bed, coming to rest, face to face by her side. Shepard lowered her head and tenderly, but passionately kissed the asari's salty, trembling mouth, tasting her tears, caressing the dark top lip with her own, gently pressing her fingers into the silky folds of the asari's neck. In response to the sweet intensity of the kiss, Liara writhed against her, desperation driving her, her body immediately demanding attention.

Their kiss deepened, becoming frenzied as their hands roamed over familiar territory, breaking only to rapidly strip each other of the clothes they wore until they lay skin to skin, legs intertwined, breasts pressed against each other, heat building with every touch. Liara drew Shepard on top of her as the last article of clothing came off and gratefully meshed into her. Swiftly, Jane eased the comforting weight of her muscled body into the soft swells of the bereft asari, their bodies immediately hungering for connection.

Liara gripped her like a lifeline, her fingers twisting into the Commander's dark hair, the other hand clinging to the rungs of her defined ribs and abs. Her body craving the asari, her arms pulling the maiden in, Shepard eased her seeking, swollen bud into the yearning heat of Liara's slick inviting warmth, where it expertly sought out and quickly found its searching, slightly arched mate. Electrified, the couple groaned with urgency as the flaming pieces came together in a magnetic fit, forming an instant forge that demanded the meld.

Lightning struck Shepard's brain as their bodies quivered in the intensely erotic, eternal dance, the unceasing voltage flowing between them threatening her with unconsciousness. She opened her eyes in time to sink into Liara's deep sapphire irises as they were crystallizing into quicksilver.

"Let me in!" Jane encouraged the enraptured maiden hoarsely, their bodies surging into each other, intensity and temperature rising. "Let me see!"

As their physical beings communed, Liara willingly obeyed her lover. Her eyes shifted to obsidian in hunger. She frantically drew Shepard's mind into her own, allowing the human to fully experience the chaos within even before she could give her invocation. "Embrace eternity..." she managed to sob softly, her body aflame but safe, her mind a tangle of fear and sorrow.

Desperately drawing her lover into the recesses of her thoughts, Liara's mind exploded, bathing them in a sea of cobalt biotic light. Through the meld they would share it all. Normally, Shepard was basked in a comforting warmth upon entering the Liara's thoughts. But instead she was plunged into a seething haze filled with barbed whiplike tendrils that scourged and stung. The asari cringed and Shepard reeled as the tendrils flailed into a catastrophic vision:

_Benezia's dead eyes and last words, her ghost laughing as the maiden ran from ruin to ruin seeking answers to unknowable questions; destruction, chaos, burning buildings, the dying screams of old and young as the blue blood of the asari painted Thessia's landscape, swirling in the dirt, in the air, in the water; the wails of banshees presiding over the cannibals ghastly feast, their clawed hands and skeletal maws bidding her welcome; Kai Leng laughing as he struck out again and again with his gleaming sword, cutting them both, then running - the green glow of Vendetta perched on his hand; the Commander's angry face streaming with scarlet, her voice echoing a battle cry as she fell into a dark abyss._

Jane felt Liara's hot tears form burning rivulets on her breasts from the grief and shame tearing through her mind, even as the maiden greedily thrust her hips into the sentinel's body, clutching her close. The Commander flushed as her engorged nerves rode the welcoming, supple body of her mate and felt the shuddering tremors racking the asari's frame. Pleasure and pain juxtaposed through their beings.

Her heart ached with the maiden's and her thoughts sickened with the shared images. The intensity of it was hard to bear, but she would never leave. Liara's sobbing mind latched on tighter to Shepard's senses, and gasping, pulled her deeper within:

_The vision continued, the elements flowing to become one in a misty gray light, reassembling themselves into a crowded circle of thousands of asari with Liara and Shepard in its center. The indigo beings lift their heads as a fleet of Reaper ships descend, spraying the unarmed mass with crimson beams of fire. They turn to dust and Shepard sees Liara look to the image of the N7's other self, only to witness the figure burn to ash. Liara is solitary in the void, lost, broken, shamed, grieving and very, very afraid to be -_ **alone.**

Panting from the physical and mental exertion, Liara's brutalized mind began to fall apart as she started frantically pulling away from the deep meld, like a diver in need of oxygen. _"No, stay!"_ Shepard cried out to her through the bond as she attempted to unleash a vision of her own. The Commander was determined to reach the maiden before her mind completely unraveled. _"Liara, don't go!"_

Somehow the tendrils of her thoughts reached out and grasped the asari's retreating mind, in the same way her arms held her desperate, sobbing body. Though she had shared images with her bondmate before, the asari had been in control. Jane had never tried to initiate the transfer of anything of the complexity authored by her own psyche. She'd never had to try to hold on to Liara's mental processes. But, she knew she had to find a way to respond to the horror, pain and deep seated fear somehow.

Their bodies still strained together, aglow with biotics, sweat and tears, as the Commander asserted her will. Focusing, she started forming an alternative to the hell in her lover's tortured brain. She had nothing of a great magnitude to offer. She prayed what she did have would do. Wrestling with her untrained mind to contain the desire flaring like a bonfire from their physical connection and trying desperately to guide Liara's focus within reach, she produced her first attempt. Rapidly sorting through brief vignettes of their time together, Shepard did her best to pick the ones that meant the most:

_Therum, Liara looking down to her from the bubble in the stasis chamber, their eyes meeting with wonder and strange, soulful recognition; Feros, the asari gently introducing her to the meld for the first time; Noveria, Liara defying her mother, saving Shepard's life; Virmire, their shared wonder at the beauty of the world and grief at Kaiden's death; The Citadel, Liara at Shepard's locker, encouraging the frustrated N7 not to give up and their sensual dance at Flux later that night; The Normandy SR-1, their rapturous first union of body and mind; Ilos, standing hand in hand in the archives; The Citadel again, working to take Saren down; Illium, the bitterweetness of their reunion; Hagalaz, the intense kiss they shared after the Shadow Broker's defeat; The Normandy SR-2, Liara's visit to the loft, the joy of reconciliation; and finally the Presidium, where they had finally agreed to spend their lives together._

Lacking the ability to color and animate the vision in the same way Liara had been able to enliven hers, Jane had to rely on injecting pure emotion to impart truth and meaning to the memories. Her efforts captivated the asari's despairing mind and the harsh whips receded. But the fine strands of the maiden's thoughts and feelings still eluded Shepard's grasp. Struggling to bring clarity to her message, she urged her distressed partner's mental gaze to new imagery. Looking back to the carefree days of her youth on her grandparent's farm, Shepard conjured a distant memory:

A _n emerald green meadow, horses grazing on the long, tall grass, divided by a wide, bubbling stream. In its rocky bank, stood two willow trees, side by side, their roots entwined, the long wands of their branches swaying together in the breeze. Suddenly, thick, blackened banks of clouds exploded, pouring torrential rain over the pasture. Thunder cracked and violently rolled, the sky lit up with a threatening, unholy light, and the wind blew fiercely over the meadow, scattering the frightened livestock and flattening the grass. The two willows struggled, bending together as the wind relentlessly blew, and the rain beat down on them mercilessly. In the distance a tall, lone live oak toppled under the brutal onslaught. Finally, the storm passed as swiftly as it came. Sunlight streamed through the bruised clouds - and the willow trees remained, their branches unharmed, their trunks close together, their interlaced, bound roots still planted firmly in the ground, still very much alive and still very much - **one.**_

The Commander cautiously began reeling in the shattered pieces of Liara's straying mind as the allegory enchanted the maiden. Her sorrow was still present, but she needn't bear it alone. She was free _not_ to be alone. _They_ were free not to be alone. Her true fear abated, grateful for her life and for Shepard, Liara's mind began to mend, whispering, _"Beautiful."_

That brief respite from their mental convergence quickly brought the lovers back to an awareness of their physical state. Their bodies had entered a holding pattern for a time, but the prolonged contact was beginning to demand fulfillment. The desire and love within their union forced their passion back to the fore as it commanded an act of creation and rebirth to balance the annihilation they had witnessed.

 _"You are everything to me,"_ Shepard told her mate through the meld as she fiercely reclaimed Liara's mouth, rediscovering the silk of her tongue and the sweetness of her lips.

Reawakened with scorching need, Liara raked her fingers over Jane's sculpted back and shoulders and plunged her recovering mind deep within Shepard's, marveling at the Commander's naked devotion and desire.

Shepard continued her passionate ministrations, rocking her lean hips into and against the asari's azure, even as her own well dripped with fire and lust. Cupping her lover's breast with one hand, she dipped her head just enough to take a hardened nipple into her mouth, pulling and ravishing it with abandon while her other hand gripped the maiden's buttocks, holding her firmly in place as they rocked in synchronicity.

Liara shimmered with pleasure, extraordinary sensations pealing through her body like a ship's bell, torn between wanting this incredible electrical current to arc between them forever and begging her Commander to fill the tingling void between her thighs.

Shepard could feel it. _They_ could feel it all. Still caressing the perfect blue breast, she brought her lips over Liara's refined collarbone, biting and nuzzling the sensitive folds at the base of her graceful neck, moving up to invade the succulence of the asari's starving mouth. The Commander growled as her smooth, erect tongue probed rhythmically against the maiden's own, suffusing her skin and face with waves of pure heat.

Uncontrollably blushing with the need for release, Liara whispered urgently against her lover's lips, nearly breathless, "Shepard...Shepard, please...please take me."

Dropping her mouth back to suckle the darkened nipple, the Commander renewed her urgent efforts as she drove her hand into the ocean between their bodies. Pulling her athletic hips to allow entry, she shifted her leg, her own slick heat finding a determined perch against the asari's thigh. Then swiftly replacing the bundle of her sex with her twirling thumb, she plunged three determined fingers into her bondmate's open, receptive body, delighting in the feel. The tightness and texture of the wet, velvety interior, mixed with the sensation she registered of her own hand, whispering within, made them crazy with desire.

Still aching, Liara arched her back as Shepard tightened the grip on her flesh, lifting her up as she plunged in, the maiden's enthusiastic pelvis undulating helplessly into the human's questing digits, craving more. Liara pressed into her lover's skin, wanting to dive beneath it, wild with the need to be one. As a surge of lightning between them crackled through her nerves, Jane clamped down on the nipple with her teeth and tongue and heard her lover cry out in a voice laced with their urgency.

Concentrating, Shepard urged her fingers deeper, allowing her agile fingertips to touch all the sensitive, hidden places in the maiden's sleek interior, burrowing over and over again, increasing the speed and intensity of each thrust, her thumb spinning circles, her other strong hand clinging to her lover's hips, adding force to each collision of pleasure.

Her body on fire, Liara produced a siren's song, keening for the Commander's mind to join her in the deepest parts of her own. The human swiftly submerged herself in the captivating ocean of those depths. Together, they rode the wave of a tsunami to its peak, diving as one though a kaleidoscope breaker of colors that fractured into a sunlit spray. Bodies humming with pleasure, minds buzzing with delight, they plummeted to the heaving waters below.

The culmination took them unaware, the force behind it suddenly, urgently begging for another release. They needed more. Shepard energized the movement of her other hand and tenderly slipped her long, soaking digits into the maiden's beckoning, pulsing rear entry, lovingly stoking the flames within.

Liara gasped, throwing her head back, her heart thundering as she pressed herself into the welcome invasion. The Commander swiftly recaptured her mouth in a deep lingering kiss, the ravenous maiden devouring her tongue and lips, her iridescent blue nails raking furrows of pleasure and pain into the human's back.

As Liara feverishly bucked in the Shepard's skilled hands, a deafening vortex descended on them, re-igniting the overwhelming fire in their bellies. Spinning to ascend, it caught them in its tumult and catapulted them to a greater height. As one, they cried out, the whirling fire of their bodies becoming white hot brands that scoured away all awareness save that of each other. Momentarily sated, they fell from that height, bodies, minds and spirits united, diving from the sky back to the waters of a peaceful sea. Filled with residual heat, the couple collapsed into each other, quaking with the magnitude of love and trust between them.

Time seemed to stand still as they lay where they fell. Bodies too weak to move, their minds rested in the shallows of the meld as they lay perfectly, firmly entwined with each other in silence, letting the twitch from the aftershocks purify their nerves. Shepard lay with her head on Liara's breast listening to the steady beat of her heart as the maiden gently ran her fingers through the fine, sweat dampened hair on the back of her lover's neck.

As they slowly recovered, Liara tenderly kissed her Commander's injured brow and carefully eased them from the meld. Sighing with contentment, she marveled. "Just about the time I think I know you, you amaze me all over again, Shepard. I didn't know that we 'fit' together or ...goddess, that you could meld like that..." Softly chuckling, she continued, "...well, until that last part anyway."

"Neither did I." Shepard confessed perhaps a bit smugly, her mind and body exhausted. "It was an act of sheer desperation."

Gently and carefully easing her hands from the soft glove of Liara's body, the Commander turned onto her back, pulling the asari's lovely face to her shoulder, her long, errant fingers tracing a light zigzag pattern across the ridges of the maiden's crest. Eyes warm with wonder, she gazed at the only soul she had ever loved this much.

"If you keep that up, you may get to try it again," the scientist teased, her eyebrow arched, one corner of her mouth dimpling. She propped herself onto an elbow. Gazing at Jane's throat, she saw that she still had her dogtags on. Threading her slim fingers down the chain she picked up the tags and pulled up the medal hanging with them. "What is this?" She asked quietly, holding the medal up for her lover to see. "I hadn't noticed it before. Where did it come from?"

Shepard tenderly caressed Liara's fingers with her own as they rubbed the surface of the antique trinket. "It's a St. Jude medal. Mom gave it to me when she saw me in Vancouver. It's a symbol from the religion I was taught. He was a Christian apostle."

"Hmm..," Liara continued her examination, turning the medal over. "But, does it have special significance?"

"Yeah." Shepard pondered its personal meaning. "It does. It's very old...belonged to my grandmother. My grandfather gave it to her. She was the rector of the church where they lived on Earth. The parish was named St. Jude's after him...um, in his honor." She laughed quietly at the irony she was about to reveal. "He was also known as the Patron Saint of Lost Causes...guess Mom thought it was appropriate."

"Very." Her bondmate's earnest answer was written in her face. Her eyes were soft, her gaze deep and loving as she delicately traced the bruised skin under the angry wound through her extraordinary lover's eyebrow, over her aquiline nose and through the curve of her cheek.

"Here." Sensing her lover's thoughts of Thessia, Shepard eased up and removed the tags. Facing her beloved, she reverently placed the chain around Liara's neck. "Keep St. Jude with you for awhile."

Liara's luminous eyes began to sparkle with teardrops at Shepard's intentions. "I can't take these, Shepard. You need them," she emphatically stated, starting to take them off.

"I insist, Liara. Do it for me. I have another set to wear courtesy of the Shadow Broker." The Sentinel stopped the maiden's hands, cocked her good eyebrow and grinned. "At least wear them until I can get you a bracelet or a ring or whatever bondmate jewelry is the right thing for us." Taking the maiden's face in her hands, she smiled, a mock growl escaping her lips. "Besides they'll remind you of where you belong."

Her next words steady, Jane sounded serious. "Do you remember what you asked me to promise after Hagalaz?"

"Of course." Liara focused on Shepard's gunmetal gray eyes, taking in the haunted look of her lover.

"If I have my way, I will live to be obscenely old and die in your arms, Liara T'Soni," the Commander vowed, her heart in her eyes. " And now I need one from you. Promise that you won't ever leave me."

"Now, that you've reminded me of what I'd be missing..." The maiden started playfully, but cut off as she saw pain flicker across Shepard's countenance. Pausing briefly to contemplate the gravity present in her lover's ravaged face, she reached up and delicately brushed the unruly hair from her Commander's eyes.

" _Never._ " Liara T'Soni softly promised, sealing her vow with a light, sweet kiss. "I am yours always."

"Excellent." Smiling with relief and satisfaction, Shepard drew her arms around the asari and reclined back on the pillows. Then she whispered into her beloved's crest, "Now, let's try to get some sleep."

"Do we have time?" Liara yawned, suddenly very languid, as she stretched to pull the warm comforter over their cooling bodies.

"We do," Shepard managed to say, pulling the maiden close, giving her an impudent grin through weary eyes. "Time enough for sleep...um...round two... _and_ to take the fight to Cerberus."

"I love you, Shepard," Liara confessed, a gentle smile gracing her lips, as she snuggled into her Commander's arms. "Thank you for finding me."

"I love you too, Liara." Gazing at her once more, Shepard fell into those glorious sapphire eyes yet again, caressing the pale, rosy freckles on her radiant face. "Thank you for wanting to be found."

The maiden couldn't resist placing one more delicate kiss on her mate's neck. Then, settling into Shepard with a beatific smile, her slim, soft palm resting on her lover's breastbone, Liara found peace. Together again at last, they lay watching the stars flow by in the overhead skylight and soon fell fast asleep in each others arms - where they both belonged.

 

xxx

 


End file.
